Buying own engagement ring?

[loveallthingsitalian]

there is a link on Q's home page to a survey about women buying their own, or contributing to, their engagement ring.

As we are all aware this forum is far better than any poll Q may do so let's have your opinions one and all, just for fun, and any humour would be greatly appreciated.

 

[warwa100]

I see Manchester is on that top 10. We obviously don't need to worry about buying our own. lol!

 

[NIKKID]

Nothing from Northern Ireland - perhaps we are more traditional over here?

My engagement ring in one of the few decent pieces of jewellery i own. Its blingtastic and bought totally by my other half. I don't approve of upgrading when you become cash rich in future - doh its not your engagement ring then folks!!! It shouldn't matter but it does - shows the character of the man if he cant save a few £'s to buy something decent unless of course the lady in question doesn't care! As for QVC suggesting diamonique - well i don't think so after all diamonds are a girls best friend!!!!!

 

[louise66]

They are a bit slow on the uptake, I read this story online a couple of days ago. When I got engaged in 1995, my fiance was studying and, therefore, not earning a wage. I had already been to uni and was, financially, quite well placed. I said I would buy the ring, as long as he paid me back. Every week, he gave me £10 until it was finished. There is absolutely no way I would buy my own engagement ring. A few years later, after he had finished studying, and had formed a career for himself, he bought me an upgrade.

 

[holmca]

When I was in the UK I was living in Cambridge which I think is near the top of the list. But now I live in France I am not on the list. My French boyfriend begged me to marry him for 5 years and to be quite honest I had been there and done that, so I wasn't that fussed. Then one day when I was browsing a jewellery shop I saw this beautiful 3 diamond diagonal ring that I knew I had to have - the problem was, what was my excuse to buy it. Ahh the proposal!!! So I bought it, went back home, proposed to him which sent him into floods of tears - Latin men are very emotional. We did go on to get married which as it turned out was very short lived.

But if the engagement doesn't progress to a marriage, the great thing about buying your own engagement ring is that you don't have to give it back!!!

 

[Vienna]

When I got engaged to my first husband way back in prehistoric 1971 I had a very limited budget because we were both young and neither of us earned much. I wore that ring for 25 years until the shank became so thin it actually snapped. My OH paid for the ring and I think it cost around £30 and when we married my wedding ring cost £9. For our silver wedding anniversary he bought me a matching engagement ring and wedding ring. Sadly he died 10 years ago but I still cherish those rings and now wear them on my right hand.
When I became engaged to my second hubby about 4 years ago I had already refused 3 proposals from him. He must have caught me at a weak moment when I finally said yes lol. We were both in our late 50`s and he admitted he`d never bought a piece of jewellery in his life, his late wife had chosen her own engagement ring back in the 70`s and he didn`t have a clue what I`d like. So we organised the ring together. I wanted something really different and he knew someone who made jewellery so asked the guy would he make it for us. I wanted an antique style ring so I bought the centre stone for it from Israel, OH paid for the surrounding stones, the platinum and the cost of having it made so yes technically I suppose I paid towards my own ring. I got what I wanted style wise, was able to choose my own stone and the whole thing became " our " ring and not just mine.

 

[loveallthingsitalian]

When we got engaged in 1970 we didn't have two pence to rub together. The ring I wanted was second hand but OH wouldn't buy it so I got a new ring which was much poorer quality for the money. I wore it until I put on weight and then wore a dress ring until our 25th when we had more disposable income when we bought a very good solitaire. Ironically this is now too big, having lost weight over the past few years so instead of resizing it I am considering looking at a reset in a slightly different design.

The first was completely his own money but after marriage all our accounts and money are pooled so theoretically I part purchased the second even if he wrote the cheque.

I am not the sentimental type so I am just as likely to wear an Eek or dress ring, the only thing which stops me is the fear of leaving it unattended - when it us on my finger I know where it is - and that it is fully insured!

Ps now that I have got him trained he would be fine with buying second hand and I do have many pieces of antique jewellery.

 

[Caroleanne]

In 1969 we went to Bray in Ireland for our holidays I was a student nurse and my husband was an apprentice engineer but as i`d looked locally and seen nothing I liked at all we decided that we would look whilst we were on holiday. We went up to Dublin for the day and in the first jewellery shop we looked in I saw exactly what I wanted I bought him a signet ring and a watch as he`s ring wasn`t as expensive as mine by a long way and I felt a bit guilty and as he much more wanted the watch than the ring lol He still has it although it can no longer be repaired as the parts are obsolete. As there was no purchase tax in Ireland then so he could afford a much more expensive ring than had he bought at home I can no longer wear either my engagement or wedding ring because my knuckles and fingers are always so swollen and they can`t be made any bigger having been done so twice and I don`t want any gold adding to them. He bought me an antique looking diamond ring for our 25th wedding anniversary that was nearly 20 years ago now which I now wear instead when out and about ... sorry for the long story

 

[Tinkerbelle]

Its a lovely story Madaboutdogs.

My engagement ring was designed and made for me. It was a lot of money and it was a joint purchase simply because we blew the original budget. I love it but I know it isn't to everyone's taste but it is mine. It is a complete one off. But it is my second engagement late in life when there is often more disposable income for couples.

 

[louise66]

When I was in the UK I was living in Cambridge which I think is near the top of the list. But now I live in France I am not on the list. My French boyfriend begged me to marry him for 5 years and to be quite honest I had been there and done that, so I wasn't that fussed. Then one day when I was browsing a jewellery shop I saw this beautiful 3 diamond diagonal ring that I knew I had to have - the problem was, what was my excuse to buy it. Ahh the proposal!!! So I bought it, went back home, proposed to him which sent him into floods of tears - Latin men are very emotional. We did go on to get married which as it turned out was very short lived.

But if the engagement doesn't progress to a marriage, the great thing about buying your own engagement ring is that you don't have to give it back!!!

Whilst I do, Judge Judy wouldn't agree with you. Apparently, becoming engaged is a contract. You accept the ring, in anticipation of getting married. If that does not happen, the contract has not been executed and he is, consequently, entitled to have his ring back. How romantic!

 

[Caroleanne]

I should have gone on to say we went to Bray Head Hotel that night as there was a `free and easy ` on ..intrigued we went and it turned out to be when people get up to sing, which was hilarious with people who thought they could sing and was tone deaf lol!! It was waiter service only and the place was packed out, I doubt you would have made it to the bar anyway. So it was easier to order a few drinks at a time ..big mistake .... when it came to standing up I couldn`t I`d never been drunk before and I never have since because I was so ill for the next two days it put me off drink for life, I was sick on the bed in the B&B ( somewhere where my future in laws had been staying for years and become friends with the owners Mike had to wash the sheet but unfortunately my room was over the kitchen door that led to the garden so they saw it hanging out of the window to dry....when asked why Mike had to think on his feet and said I`d spilled some perfume and as the smell was overpowering and I`d jut rinsed the spot!! Overpowering yes but not of perfume !! lol ..the odd glass of wine with a meal is my limit now

 

[poppy43]

Way back in 1955 - I was 16 and my future husband was 17 - we decided to get engaged. The ring cost £12.10s. 0d. which was all my future husbands total Post Office Account. We married two years later. I wore the ring every day and still do although about 10 years ago it had worn so thin from rubbing on my eternity ring that I had to have it cut off but a jeweller built the back up but in the process it was made smaller so I couldn't wear it on my ring finger but I have since worn it on my right hand 'pinkie' finger. My darling husband be another ring for my ring finger which is very nice................but not as lovely as the original. Btw - we are now 76 and 78 and still going strong. x x