If You Must Have Musack...

[iclaudipuss]

Honestly, why have plinky-plonky stuff, along with the dreaded heartbeat, when you could have any number of classic and well-loved tunettes to ease the strain of the viewers having to listen to squawking eejits who can't quite realise that a microphone means never having to say you're sorry for causing bleeding of the eardrums.

I would suggest one or more from the following list of some of my personal favourites:



Don't Laugh At Me Cos I'm A Jewel

I Can't Get No Scintillation

These Foolish Rings Remind Me Of You

Money's Too Spessartite To Mention

(It's A Long, Long Time) From Vermeil To September

Abalone Again, Naturally

Let's Go Fly A Kyanite

It Came Upon A Midnight Clearance

Strangers In The Morganite

To Zircon With Love

Jessica Lili The Pink

Light My Sapphire

Oh, What A Tanzanite, Late December 1963

My Pearl's Mad At Me

When I'm 64 Carats

How Long Has This Sphene Going On?

Oops, Diopside Your Head

We've Got Prehnite, Who Needs Tomorrow?

24 Hours From Topaz

I Can See Clearance Now The Rainbow Moonstone Has Gone

Bracelet It Be

Bat Out Of Heliodor

I Guess That's Why They Call It The London Blues

Have I The Pyrite To Hold You?

Won't You Roll Away The Sunstone?

You're A Zoisite For Sore Eyes

Sweet Clarity

If I'm A Jewel For Loving You

She's Got Legs, She Knows How To Use Gems

I never Promised You A Rose Quartz Garden

Don't Think Twice, It's Tsavorite

You Are Every Ring, And Every Ring Is You

Love On The Coloured Rocks

The Man From Larimar

Hold On Tight To Your Sphenes

And The (Heart) Beat Goes On

I Wanna Hold Your Sandstone

Karma Carnelian

You Can call Me Al(an Miller)

Total Eclipse Quartz Of The Heart

Rare Are You Now?


Far more apropos than the endless plink plonk, plink plonk rubbish. Think on.

 

[jinnyjamjar]

How about Lulu's "Shout"?

Anything by Chas and Dave would also be appropriate I think - just to add to the market stall ambience - however, if they still want to keep to an unsubtle, pounding cacophony what about the theme tune to Jaws? It's got all the right components; a shark, lots of people screaming, and the element of disaster....

Jinny

 

[perdita]

My personal favourite was always, "Iolite of the Silvery Moon". :biggrin:

 

[iclaudipuss]

And let's not forget these old classics, all of them to be found on any good K-Tel record circa 1973:


Citrine On The Dock Of The Bay

Rockin' All Over The Pearl

Fly Me To The Moonstone

Signed, Sealed, Delivered, I'm Flaws

Are You Abalonesome Tonight?

Agate Restless When I Think Of You

Love Is Like A Butterfly Clasp

Dancing Sphene

Smoky Quartz Gets In Your Eyes

Oh, Coral

Shell We Dance?

What Is This Bling Called Love?

Knock On Peanut Wood

I'm Left, You're Fluorite, She's Gone

Moonstone River

My Tigers Eye(s) Adored You

I Am 16, Going On 17 Carats

Make The Pearl Go Away

For Emerald, Wherever I May Find Her

 

[Klosblue]

I think the theme tune from Titanic would be suitable because from what I read and see, they're definitely sinking fast!