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Pinkpussycat
Guest Shopper
Yes they all use the old infamous get out of jail comment especially on the jewellery channels....with the exception of Chloe Marshall who just makes outragoeus claims and forgets that bit.
'For you'
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barbedwire
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- Jun 24, 2008
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'I've got less than 100 of these in stock now..' (have you dear? why - do you live in the QVC Warehouse?)
'Go on, buy it - you've got nothing to lose with your 30 day MBG' (No - apart from £100 p&p charges and the hassle of getting to the post office to send it back...)
'It's got nothing but 5 star reviews on the website...' (we took out all the bad ones from moaning minnies and left all the ones from the gushing gerties in)
'Wear this with a crisp white shirt and jeans...' (I haven't worn a crisp white shirt since I was in primary school, and by playtime it was covered in plasticine and other unmentionables)
'Go on, buy it - you've got nothing to lose with your 30 day MBG' (No - apart from £100 p&p charges and the hassle of getting to the post office to send it back...)
'It's got nothing but 5 star reviews on the website...' (we took out all the bad ones from moaning minnies and left all the ones from the gushing gerties in)
'Wear this with a crisp white shirt and jeans...' (I haven't worn a crisp white shirt since I was in primary school, and by playtime it was covered in plasticine and other unmentionables)
ArtDeco
Registered Shopper
I'm in complete agreement with absolutely everything posted so far! My personal pet hates include...
Julian Ballantyne making every single guest feel ancient: “Now like me, you’ve been here at QVC for many years...” :sleepy: (also works to underscore his tenants rights, surely the only reason he’s still there is cos he’s always been there). Plus his bizarre punctuation: “Now I can tell you that [pause] item number 669 2 [pause] 34, the Northern [pause] Nights, 350 [pause] thread count...”
Alison Keenan’s rather patronizing claim that she has a ‘spoily’ for me – it’s not a case of her treating me out of the goodness of her heart now is it?!
Charlie Brook’s filler lines: “Hair, at cue va seeeeeee.” He and Jilly Halliday are also guilty of inserting an inappropriate 'd' into prices i.e. pronouncing £36.49 as "thirdy six pounds, and fordy nine pence"
Jill Franks’ grates with me in particular, the girly girl/dog updates stuff goes without saying, but also her sing song “lovely to see you” to every guest and her claim that every product she sells is doing what she fails abysmally at i.e. “proving to be very popular” :taphead:
A lot of it has got to be about who we warm to as individuals – I like those presenters most people hate so Debbie Flint’s “rush to those phones”, Craig’s constant re-introduction of himself as if it’s his first day and Claire’s baby-waby ways just make me smile! :happy:
Julian Ballantyne making every single guest feel ancient: “Now like me, you’ve been here at QVC for many years...” :sleepy: (also works to underscore his tenants rights, surely the only reason he’s still there is cos he’s always been there). Plus his bizarre punctuation: “Now I can tell you that [pause] item number 669 2 [pause] 34, the Northern [pause] Nights, 350 [pause] thread count...”
Alison Keenan’s rather patronizing claim that she has a ‘spoily’ for me – it’s not a case of her treating me out of the goodness of her heart now is it?!
Charlie Brook’s filler lines: “Hair, at cue va seeeeeee.” He and Jilly Halliday are also guilty of inserting an inappropriate 'd' into prices i.e. pronouncing £36.49 as "thirdy six pounds, and fordy nine pence"
Jill Franks’ grates with me in particular, the girly girl/dog updates stuff goes without saying, but also her sing song “lovely to see you” to every guest and her claim that every product she sells is doing what she fails abysmally at i.e. “proving to be very popular” :taphead:
A lot of it has got to be about who we warm to as individuals – I like those presenters most people hate so Debbie Flint’s “rush to those phones”, Craig’s constant re-introduction of himself as if it’s his first day and Claire’s baby-waby ways just make me smile! :happy:
Last edited:
LE lover
Registered Shopper
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- Sep 18, 2009
- Messages
- 2,748
:mysmilie_357:scary.
There are so many phrases that get on my wick, a lot of them have already been mentioned. AY on beauty shows spouting about lotions and potions being luxurious and prestigious drives me nuts. During the Gatineau shows she talks about Andrew discovering the youth moloecule,that is melatoginine, as though he should win a nobel prize for services to wrinkles.
Others include' "I'm using this moisturiser,/showergel/ lipgloss,etc and i've just run out of it." Usually followed by i have one in the glovebox, one in my handbag and one in the bathroom.
presenters tryng to make out that it's quite normal to pay nearly £30 for a bubble bath. when you could buy 30 bottles in asda or boots for that price.
"This is proving to be very popular if you want it you'll have to be quick."
"We are the only stockists of this brand in the uk." Pinochio springs to mind
The excessive oohing and aahing over any food product they are tasting.
Rant over
There are so many phrases that get on my wick, a lot of them have already been mentioned. AY on beauty shows spouting about lotions and potions being luxurious and prestigious drives me nuts. During the Gatineau shows she talks about Andrew discovering the youth moloecule,that is melatoginine, as though he should win a nobel prize for services to wrinkles.
Others include' "I'm using this moisturiser,/showergel/ lipgloss,etc and i've just run out of it." Usually followed by i have one in the glovebox, one in my handbag and one in the bathroom.
presenters tryng to make out that it's quite normal to pay nearly £30 for a bubble bath. when you could buy 30 bottles in asda or boots for that price.
"This is proving to be very popular if you want it you'll have to be quick."
"We are the only stockists of this brand in the uk." Pinochio springs to mind
The excessive oohing and aahing over any food product they are tasting.
Rant over
Bea Frugal
Registered Shopper
- Joined
- Feb 1, 2010
- Messages
- 1,677
Welcome Scary. Yes, yes, yes. I agree with all posts. Another one is Charlie's 'take a look at this here'. Where? Not over there? Are you sure? Don't want to be looking in the wrong place. Happily he seems to be taking a long holiday. Here? Hopefully far far away over there. Didn't realise how pleased I'd be if he never came back until he went away! Beware presenters taking too many hols.
As for So-and-so is in the building, that should be reserved for Elvis.
As for So-and-so is in the building, that should be reserved for Elvis.
amn
Registered Shopper
And the Boy Brooks constantly calls it QVCtheshoppingchannel. Buffoon.
For me its the "this is the most affordable item in the hour" (cheap and probably nasty) and "its a considered purchase", (ridiculously expensive and you'd need to remortgage your house).
Oh and The Resident Beauty Gobshite, with "I need you on Qcut the website or the redactive button". Which she obviously shouts at a gazillion decibels. Whilst, or course, the guest is tryng to talk. Cant abide the woman.
The whole of this thread has made me larf!SweetCheeks
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- Aug 25, 2010
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- 36
madaunty
Quietly, Very Confused
"We have a brilliant price on this, and I challenge you to look anywhere and find it cheaper! - said Julian this morning, referring to the TSV. Well I have and I did. £509 at Amazon and free P & P.
Be careful what you wish for.
Be careful what you wish for.
Welcome Scary!
Ok, mine are...
"Dipping your toe in the water..."
"As we speak..."
"Waiting in the wings..."
"There is queues on the phones...." AY is bad for this one.
"One in the guest room, bathroom, his bathroom, her bathroom, en suite, downstairs loo, private jet...."
"Buy one in each colour as you can always send it back..." Yup, never mind how much that would cost, all that added P&P and then you get The Letter when all you've done is what they suggested.
"Woman of age...." Coming from a man of age.
JF "how aaaaaare you?" Every single time.
"Don't get me started...."
"What am I like...."
"I'm such a girlie..."
Not forgetting everything else that comes out of JF's mouth.
However, the very worst has got to be, IMO "This is to die for!". Actually no, I don't think so. I can't think of anything QVC could possibly sell that I would actually die for
I think QVC is bad for my mental health. There are men in white coats knocking at the door now. Off to the funny farm! Perhaps I'll bump into ex-QVC presenters there. Lucky for me the weekend was so boring as I didn't turn the telly on at all.
I love this forum Always good for a laugh
Ok, mine are...
"Dipping your toe in the water..."
"As we speak..."
"Waiting in the wings..."
"There is queues on the phones...." AY is bad for this one.
"One in the guest room, bathroom, his bathroom, her bathroom, en suite, downstairs loo, private jet...."
"Buy one in each colour as you can always send it back..." Yup, never mind how much that would cost, all that added P&P and then you get The Letter when all you've done is what they suggested.
"Woman of age...." Coming from a man of age.
JF "how aaaaaare you?" Every single time.
"Don't get me started...."
"What am I like...."
"I'm such a girlie..."
Not forgetting everything else that comes out of JF's mouth.
However, the very worst has got to be, IMO "This is to die for!". Actually no, I don't think so. I can't think of anything QVC could possibly sell that I would actually die for
I think QVC is bad for my mental health. There are men in white coats knocking at the door now. Off to the funny farm! Perhaps I'll bump into ex-QVC presenters there. Lucky for me the weekend was so boring as I didn't turn the telly on at all.
I love this forum
Always good for a laugh Hi Scary
How about - It would be great in:
the kitchen
the bathroom
the 'guest' bathroom
the ensuite
next door's loo
the greenhouse
the cellar
the shed
..and so on
Or a present for:
the teacher
the ballet teacher
the au-pair
the window cleaner
the dustbin man
or for those people you have forgotten.
And wear it with
a trouser
a skirt
pumps
flats
boots
heels
scarf
hat
I could keep going....
How about - It would be great in:
the kitchen
the bathroom
the 'guest' bathroom
the ensuite
next door's loo
the greenhouse
the cellar
the shed
..and so on
Or a present for:
the teacher
the ballet teacher
the au-pair
the window cleaner
the dustbin man
or for those people you have forgotten.
And wear it with
a trouser
a skirt
pumps
flats
boots
heels
scarf
hat
I could keep going....
C
Ciociaria
Guest Shopper
My pet hate is the fake, near orgasmic reaction presenters have when sniffing Yankee Candles, L'Occitane or worse - Tova! Nothing smells that good.
Loveinamist
Registered Shopper
I can't understand the present stand-by. I plan present giving and couldn't envisage having a draw with stuff "just in case" someone gives me a present that I then have to reciprocate. If someone was to give me a present it would be out of the blue and I couldn't "act" "oh I have one for you too!" I'm not that good an actress, or maybe I just can't lie!.
JustBrowsingMadam
Registered Shopper
- Joined
- Oct 31, 2009
- Messages
- 134
WELCOME SCARY!
My top one's lately are...
'When you get this home' - um thought that was the whole point i.e. you deliver to my home therefore I'm not going anywhere to get it...
'XXX is in the buillllllllllding' (I wonder if AY does that on the farm? 'The vet is in the building')
'As you can see the models wearing the bag' I usually carry mine but I suppose with the 'great organisationly functuality' of Kipling bags they would make a handy coat.
My top one's lately are...
'When you get this home' - um thought that was the whole point i.e. you deliver to my home therefore I'm not going anywhere to get it...
'XXX is in the buillllllllllding' (I wonder if AY does that on the farm? 'The vet is in the building')
'As you can see the models wearing the bag' I usually carry mine but I suppose with the 'great organisationly functuality' of Kipling bags they would make a handy coat.
alibeth
Birdy
silversequin
Registered Shopper
- Joined
- Aug 2, 2009
- Messages
- 2,041
I know we have mentioned "jump to the phones" as ultra irritiating, well it always gives me an image of kangaroos! Guess this is because sheep can't jump and they couldn't really say "shuffle to the phone in a mindless, thoughtless drove while we cattle prod you into buyng with talk of limited stock"
norfolk dumpling
Registered Shopper
- Joined
- May 15, 2009
- Messages
- 134
eeeeeeelongate
I have to warn you that we sold out of this on it's last airing (eh what? warn me?...runs off terrified that product will reappear!)
I need you on the phones (why? commission depending on it?)
We have sold 50,000 of these in the past (yes, since QVC begain life in 1913 NOT in the last week just to fool viewers into thinking they sell trillions of the stuff!)
What is clever about this product (never seems to be anything unique and every product seems to be clever!)
And stating the bleeding obvious when a item is shown as a duo or trio and the presenter says: "What you are getting here is 2/3 of them" arghhhhhh!!
:sweat:
I need you on the phones (why? commission depending on it?)
We have sold 50,000 of these in the past (yes, since QVC begain life in 1913 NOT in the last week just to fool viewers into thinking they sell trillions of the stuff!)
What is clever about this product (never seems to be anything unique and every product seems to be clever!)
And stating the bleeding obvious when a item is shown as a duo or trio and the presenter says: "What you are getting here is 2/3 of them" arghhhhhh!!
:sweat:
- Joined
- Jun 26, 2008
- Messages
- 6,383
I can't live without this (lipstick, sink plunger, diamoneeeek nose ring etc)
wear it with city shorts or your white linen trousers
UN.........believable (Dale)
This feather bed/memory topper etc will cradle your body and these 80000 count sheets will caress your skin especially if you sleep in the buff
I've got one of these at home, and one of these, and that one, oh and this one, I've two of those in my kitchen, my mum has this in every colour,
wear it with city shorts or your white linen trousers
UN.........believable (Dale)
This feather bed/memory topper etc will cradle your body and these 80000 count sheets will caress your skin especially if you sleep in the buff
I've got one of these at home, and one of these, and that one, oh and this one, I've two of those in my kitchen, my mum has this in every colour,
