Random musings and general banter.

[Muttley]

A Dunlop shaver. Will it pump up my tyres?

I'm worried it will pump up my spare typre

 

[Duke of Cheese]

If I get nightmares tonight I'll know who to blame! Genuinely scary picture

I know…the rear shot in evening dress, you mean…

 

[Duke of Cheese]

I'm worried it will pump up my spare typre

I use the one around my middle…

Has he heard of the studio floor to demonstrate a toy car effectively? Oh God…they only have a Kodak Instamatic camera, and can’t film the floor.

 

[Herring]

Jean Paul permits another Duchump night.

Hi, Jean Paul, it's IW. We've got customer returns to send—
FOR THE FIFTH TIME OF TELLING YOU, IW - PERPETUAL LUXURY IS NOT PERPETUALLY AVAILABLE! THAT IS WHY THE HANDS STOP MOVING ON OUR WATCHES.
That's fine; but the returns—
FINE—I'VE JUST FOUND ANOTHER BOX OF 2000 IN THE CUPBOARD, HIDDEN BEHIND A DOG EARED COPY OF SIMON SAYS AND A BOTTLE OF DUBAI AIR FRESHENER. HAVE 'EM – BUT THAT'S IT, THEY'VE SOLD OUT.
We aren't asking for more, we need to send back—
FINE—AV ANOTHER BOX OF 1000. GEEZ, YOU LOT ARE BLEEDIN' ME DRY HERE IN… IS IT THE SWISS PLACE. YOU DRIVE A HARD BARGAIN.
We really don't need any more, we can't sell the ones we have, we need to send—
FINE—I'LL DRESS UP AS CHRISSIE AND TAKE JEZZA TO THE PUB AGAIN TO STOP HIM BORING YOU ALL WITH TALES OF HIS HOLLYOAKS DAYS.
Deal.

 

[Jazzydrury]

I use the one around my middle…

Has he heard of the studio floor to demonstrate a toy car effectively? Oh God…they only have a Kodak Instamatic camera, and can’t film the floor.

Rather than him just talking about it, why not use the VT from yesterday

 

[Scraping the barrel]

Pete doesn’t know how to demonstrate that car is the problem.
A demo would be worth a 1000 words of his verbal garbage!

A ‘good buy’ he says
He’s right, and it’s ‘good bye’ from me. My head is hurting

 

[Duke of Cheese]

Chef Joe has apparently been travelling the world appearing on various cooking programmes. With an award winning BBC director in the gimp ro…er..Gallery, a peripatetic world renowned TV chef, and a BAFTA winning star of BBC television - we should be honoured to have such quality of individuals working on a £9.99 shopping channel with no floor cameras.

 

[Herring]

A ‘good buy’ he says
He’s right, and it’s ‘good bye’ from me. My head is hurting

 

[Duke of Cheese]

Say it isn’t so, Dean…Don’t sell
your soul for the Exemplar shilling..

 

[Samki]

Pete the perv is on form tonight, mispronouncing duralex - w️

 

[galesgal57]

1960's Duchump!! Thought the company was only a few years old.

 

[Duke of Cheese]

Pre-show planning meeting today with Chris, Jean-Paul and Walter..

 

[Scraping the barrel]

View attachment 30398

Killed myself laughing at this! I must have a weird sense of humour!
What did it was a sight of the Emu and that pic of the girl shouting at the telly..that’s me although wrong sex.
Well done! I was hooked by a Herring

 

[Scraping the barrel]

Pete the perv is on form tonight, mispronouncing duralex - w️

Selling condoms now is he? Well he is a big kn*b

 

[Scraping the barrel]

Pete the perv is on form tonight, mispronouncing duralex - w️

Muriel’s in! She’s on a date tonight with Trevor from the Cotswolds

(He,Trevor,got a mention again from our mate Pete tonight).

Trevor,Trevor I’m reaching out to you Get a life before it’s too late or you will become very ill with MasonSimonitis..

 

[Duke of Cheese]

1960's Duchump!! Thought the company was only a few years old.

If the truth ever inadvertently fell out of that gob on-air, he’d probably keel over with the shock of what he’d done.

Walk back in and Hinge and Bracket are going hammer and tongs towards the selling orgasmic peak - or lack of it. They could have used that pair of insufferables for obtaining immediate confessions at Guantanamo Bay.

And that’s not a surname on the screen behind her. That’s the Dutch World Cup Squad from 1974.

 

[PhædrusR]

1960's Duchump!! Thought the company was only a few years old.

Do you like my "Patek Philippe" 'Genoa'?

Automatic, exhibition back, 2 sweep second hands (main and ⁶ complication), 24 hour (³ complication) and day/night indicator at 12.

 

[Battiola73]

The weighted blankets filled with ceramic beads. Use ceramic beads to bond bake pastry to stop it rising. Theyre quite heavy. Wonder how heavy the blanket is?

That should be blind bake

 

[HughTwo]

That should be blind bake

Don't give them ideas - "chef" Mark and Dirty Pedro will be making a pie from the corner of a weighted blanket.
Not only is it weighted, not only does it bake superbly, not only is it flammable......wooosh!

 

[Jazzydrury]

Jeremy Edward’s getting evicted from the Big Brother house, Pity we can’t do the same from IW