Desperation

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Wot, our Pete can't speak proper? That epitome of spoken English, the man who utters poetry with every phrase he speaks? It's no good, I definitely need help of some kind before it's too late......on 2nd thoughts, it may already be too late....
aqua said:
The presenters seem to be under extreme pressure to go right over the top. I love the stock updates especially the copious use of the word 'entire' as in ' 40% of the entire stock has now gone !'
Loen was on yesterday selling the 5/2 diet meals which is a bit like Peter Simon selling courses in conversational English.
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The 5PM hour today (19/11/15) its the Tower Family Pie Maker.

The salesman (dont want to mention his name as he only likes good words spoken about him to massage his ego, lets just says its.....Mr Whiter than White All right gerrrrrrls)

To quote said salesman man "Guyyyys these are flying out, stocks depleting like no one buisness" "Nahhhhh am not just saying that for effect............I HAVE NO REASON TO SAY THAT".........................Oh really do you not? Well why not just present the product without all the dramatic stock updates every 30 seconds????
 
historymystery said:
Wot, our Pete can't speak proper? That epitome of spoken English, the man who utters poetry with every phrase he speaks? It's no good, I definitely need help of some kind before it's too late......on 2nd thoughts, it may already be too late....
Click to expand...

Have you heard him do the Tower voiceover? He doesn't half put his proper posh accent on, like Tower becomes something like 'Taar'
 
S C O said:
The 5PM hour today (19/11/15) its the Tower Family Pie Maker.

The salesman (dont want to mention his name as he only likes good words spoken about him to massage his ego, lets just says its.....Mr Whiter than White All right gerrrrrrls)

To quote said salesman man "Guyyyys these are flying out, stocks depleting like no one buisness" "Nahhhhh am not just saying that for effect............I HAVE NO REASON TO SAY THAT".........................Oh really do you not? Well why not just present the product without all the dramatic stock updates every 30 seconds????
Click to expand...

It's really getting on my bits this is! The other night old Pervypie had 20 minutes or so to go with a pressure cooker, with only 8% of the stock left. So, for the next 20 minutes till the hour ended, we had a countdown every few minutes of how much stock was left. At the end of the show, he still had 3% left!! Exhausting.........

Then the next hour starts and here we go, two minutes in and '5% of the stock has already gone' ffs! The constant interruptions are irritating. They always use the excuse that 'we don't want you to miss out'....yeah right. You are trying to panic sell and it's annoying.
 
Momma, yes I have, and it's hilarious! He's a man of many talents - deeply spiritual when Kinkykade or the Holy Land jewellery is on, frightfully pawsh when it's Tower (or "Tar" as Pete says) and then Cor flippin heck, mate - and racing around like he's got a dynamo placed somewhere nasty when the ladders bloke is there. Obviously those many years at RADA - or "Radar" in Petespeak - have not been wasted. Mr Cumberbatch, eat your heart out....
Mommabear said:
Have you heard him do the Tower voiceover? He doesn't half put his proper posh accent on, like Tower becomes something like 'Taar'
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They really do think we are daft, don't they? But having said this, I must confess my guilty pleasure.....listening to Pete give a variety of different percentages of stock that has "gone". I know, I know - I need to get out more.. Hilarious, as he just plucks figures from the air, forgetting what he's said 3 minutes earlier....so 50%'s gone, then 20%'s gone, then 45%'s gone. I take bets with myself over what figure he'll come out with next. I wonder someone doesn't whisper gently in his earpiece YER GETTING IT ALL WRONG, YOU T...


Mommabear said:
It's really getting on my bits this is! The other night old Pervypie had 20 minutes or so to go with a pressure cooker, with only 8% of the stock left. So, for the next 20 minutes till the hour ended, we had a countdown every few minutes of how much stock was left. At the end of the show, he still had 3% left!! Exhausting.........

Then the next hour starts and here we go, two minutes in and '5% of the stock has already gone' ffs! The constant interruptions are irritating. They always use the excuse that 'we don't want you to miss out'....yeah right. You are trying to panic sell and it's annoying.
Click to expand...
 
Don't get me started on Mike Mason, I switched on to watch the Tefal hour when I got home from work and he was on with the female presenter who sometimes does the cooking shows and I don't think he knew her name (like me) as he kept referring to her as 'darlin'. I mean for heavens sake it might be suitable for the market but surely not a shopping channel as you can gather it really irritated me.
 
I think that's his way of referring to any woman....probably saves him the bother of remembering their individual names. It doesn't sound professional at all, and I'm longing to hear one of them say "I'm not your darlin".
cazzie said:
Don't get me started on Mike Mason, I switched on to watch the Tefal hour when I got home from work and he was on with the female presenter who sometimes does the cooking shows and I don't think he knew her name (like me) as he kept referring to her as 'darlin'. I mean for heavens sake it might be suitable for the market but surely not a shopping channel as you can gather it really irritated me.
Click to expand...
 
You guys need to do what I just did: I have had a wonderful week away on a cruise holiday with no Ideal World, no Peter Simon wiping his wet bum on the floor, no Barra Boi going 'Cor Blimey' and 'Lubba Duck' every three minutes, no Howard emptying his bowels into a Nutribullet or the latest Tefal Air Fryer...

I feel refreshed, sane and ready for the dulcet tones of Screeching Sally Orgasm, once more! Bring it all on! :sun::sun:
 
Greg said:
You guys need to do what I just did: I have had a wonderful week away on a cruise holiday with no Ideal World, no Peter Simon wiping his wet bum on the floor, no Barra Boi going 'Cor Blimey' and 'Lubba Duck' every three minutes, no Howard emptying his bowels into a Nutribullet or the latest Tefal Air Fryer...

I feel refreshed, sane and ready for the dulcet tones of Screeching Sally Orgasm, once more! Bring it all on! :sun::sun:
Click to expand...

When I stayed in a b and b in Weymouth this year, the TV didn't have any shopping channels tuned in and I suffered severe withdrawal symptoms. Luckily my friends on this forum kept me updated with all the stock updates and news. I did not come home feeling refreshed. Obviously I need therapy...
 
S C O said:
The 5PM hour today (19/11/15) its the Tower Family Pie Maker.

The salesman (dont want to mention his name as he only likes good words spoken about him to massage his ego, lets just says its.....Mr Whiter than White All right gerrrrrrls)

To quote said salesman man "Guyyyys these are flying out, stocks depleting like no one buisness" "Nahhhhh am not just saying that for effect............I HAVE NO REASON TO SAY THAT".........................Oh really do you not? Well why not just present the product without all the dramatic stock updates every 30 seconds????
Click to expand...

I can't think who you are talking about (snigger snigger). Oh all right I do, he's a great Cockney Geezer!
 
Muttley said:
I can't think who you are talking about (snigger snigger). Oh all right I do, he's a great Cockney Geezer!
Click to expand...

Mr Disingenuous himself, probably just got there straight from his gig darn the market giwls, or his gowdess kicked him arht.
 
"C'mon girrrls! Donchya wanna lil bit o'Mikey Magic in those luuurve pouches of yours, darhlin'...?"
 
:mysmilie_504::mysmilie_483: Priceless, Greg! The pictures conjured up by your descriptions are, quite frankly, nothing short of terrifying...but I'm choking myself laughing!
Greg said:
You guys need to do what I just did: I have had a wonderful week away on a cruise holiday with no Ideal World, no Peter Simon wiping his wet bum on the floor, no Barra Boi going 'Cor Blimey' and 'Lubba Duck' every three minutes, no Howard emptying his bowels into a Nutribullet or the latest Tefal Air Fryer...

I feel refreshed, sane and ready for the dulcet tones of Screeching Sally Orgasm, once more! Bring it all on! :sun::sun:
Click to expand...
 

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