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brissles said:
I'm on my own with the dog, and I'm turning my phone off because well meaning callers tend to say something stupid like "are you having a nice day ? " I mean my life is Groundhog Day and 25th December wont be any different, so if anyone can tell me how having a 'nice' day on your own, happens then let me know. Of course I say, yes fine thanks, when in reality I want to say "how can it be nice, unwrapping presents on my own, having a M & S ready meal, and with no-one to talk to eh?" but I don't so it doesn't upset anyone.

So if you know someone on their own and call them, please don't say that because it can cut really deep.
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I'm on my own, too, Bristles, but with three dogs. I don't have to turn my phone off because no one is going to call anyway ! I didn't wrap up any presents for myself, but I did buy a few unnecessary things from Amazon. I'm not one to cook for myself, so I am planning on making a cold buffet for one, although the dogs will eat the bits they like. All of this and the novel 'Shuggie Bain" on my Kindle will make my day nice enough.
 
Grizelda said:
I'm on my own, too, Bristles, but with three dogs. I don't have to turn my phone off because no one is going to call anyway ! I didn't wrap up any presents for myself, but I did buy a few unnecessary things from Amazon. I'm not one to cook for myself, so I am planning on making a cold buffet for one, although the dogs will eat the bits they like. All of this and the novel 'Shuggie Bain" on my Kindle will make my day nice enough.
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You can’t beat the company of dogs 🐕 they never judge you.😊
 
Vienna said:
It`s been a hell of a year for most people and not just through covid. I find Christmas bittersweet now I`m older and I find my mind wandering to the many people I`ve lost, parents, siblings, husband, friends etc and I remember Christmases past with them.
It`s sometimes like an elastic band around my heart and squeezing until it hurts but then I flip it and simply delete the word "Christmas" which leaves just another "day". A day to do as I please and to see or not see the people I choose. This year means families can`t always be together in the physical sense but hopefully not for much longer.
I`ve spent excited Christmases as a child waiting for Father Christmas to come, social Christmases as a teen when you couldn`t wait to wear a new outfit and catch up with mates, hard up Christmases as a newly wed with barely 2 pennies to rub together, family Christmases with my own young children and sneaking toys downstairs past their bedroom doors in the middle of the night and getting barely 2 hours sleep before one of them pokes you awake and asking "has he been yet??". Grief stricken Christmases when my Mum suddenly passed away just a couple of weeks before and I found the presents she`d bought for people all wrapped and stacked in her wardrobe, the Christmas my late husband found out he had cancer and the following Christmas when he was no longer with us. The thrilling Christmas my DIL did a secret pregnancy test and my son told me I was going to be a Grandma for the first time.
The Christmases I worked and seeing the clients I worked with who were much worse off than me but still trying to make the most of their Christmas Day. The Christmases I was alone but not lonely and also the Christmases when I was so lonely I cried and so on.
That elastic band around my heart has stretched far and wide many times with happiness and tightened many times in pain or grief but that`s the story of my life, not just Christmas and I think its pretty much the same for all of us.
Wherever you are and whatever you`re doing or not doing over Christmas then I wish you all well. We may never meet in the flesh but we sometimes bare our souls on here and know that even if only one person is listening to us then at least we are being heard and that is a precious gift and not just for Christmas. We are ALL special !
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Aw yes V, that pretty much sums up life in general. Christmas is a time for reflection as we wait for the next year to roll on in, hoping it brings us good health and happiness. This year especially I think most of us will be glad to see the back of 2020, what an absolute ****** year it’s been. I agree about being alone and not lonely, that comes from liking your own company, so what every you’re doing luv, I hope it’s a safe and happy one. The support we show each other is amazing and that love, support and compassion is never ending for each other on STF, I agree, we never meet yet love each other all the same, so thanks Graham and Sazza, you’ve done another amazing job this year, as always, so thank you.................same to all my Forum buddies 😘🎄🎁🎄🎁🙏🎁❤️
 
Why ? oh why does this country and I take in the whole UK expect everyone to be with their loving extended family? If you are not then you are felt to be a social outcast, not so!.I am sick and tired of those who are not going to be with their loved ones as they would like this Christmas.Is it beyond the moaners to think how many have a loved one missing this Christmas?There is an ‘elephant in the room’ sorry we cannot deal with the way you are feeling let us just move on to ME!
 
brissles said:
I'm on my own with the dog, and I'm turning my phone off because well meaning callers tend to say something stupid like "are you having a nice day ? " I mean my life is Groundhog Day and 25th December wont be any different, so if anyone can tell me how having a 'nice' day on your own, happens then let me know. Of course I say, yes fine thanks, when in reality I want to say "how can it be nice, unwrapping presents on my own, having a M & S ready meal, and with no-one to talk to eh?" but I don't so it doesn't upset anyone.

So if you know someone on their own and call them, please don't say that because it can cut really deep.
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What do you suggest we say, please.
 
I can't put it any better than people have already said so well, but just want to add my best wishes to everyone and thanks for keeping me so entertained through what has been an awful year for so many, I count myself lucky to still be sane, and have a job. (Well one out of two isnt and!) Hope that you all have a Merry Christmas and a much better 2021 xx
 
Letz-be-avenue said:
I can't put it any better than people have already said so well, but just want to add my best wishes to everyone and thanks for keeping me so entertained through what has been an awful year for so many, I count myself lucky to still be sane, and have a job. (Well one out of two isnt and!) Hope that you all have a Merry Christmas and a much better 2021 xx
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Yes Lbe A when I get down and bordering on the bitter side I pull up the positives, it is an uneasy balance sometimes but the down cannot be allowed to win!
 
Silver Fox said:
Why ? oh why does this country and I take in the whole UK expect everyone to be with their loving extended family? If you are not then you are felt to be a social outcast, not so!.I am sick and tired of those who are not going to be with their loved ones as they would like this Christmas.Is it beyond the moaners to think how many have a loved one missing this Christmas?There is an ‘elephant in the room’ sorry we cannot deal with the way you are feeling let us just move on to ME!
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I love Christmas, so much so that our daughters have always said I'm a yuleaholic. However, I can see through all the hype about huge gatherings with everyone happy to see each other, staying over in beautifully decorated houses where the food is amazing, the children are cherubic & there's just enough snow to make the photos look perfect. I think there will be many people relieved that this year they don't have to spend hours in the company of relatives they don't like, we've been spared long journeys on the M5 & hours of sitting on the most uncomfortable sofa ever made. As for those moaners, they're people who only ever consider themselves so not worth another thought.
 
JeepSwensonfan said:
It will be 6 years on Wrestling day that our mam died.

So, this time of year isn't the best.
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I'm sorry. It's always a difficult anniversary but when it's on a recognised day it's even harder. My mum died on the Queen's Golden Jubilee, I remember watching the TV coverage of all those thousands outside the palace & feeling completely empty. I find my parents' birthdays the most difficult days because they always celebrated them with joy; the dates when we lost them were not significant during their lives so I've ranked them second.
 
Yep, losing someone at any time of the year is a bit rubbish, but when they've passed during 'holidays' then the emotions really kick in every year. My husband passed on New Year's Day - at home with a heart attack with no warning, he was 54, so 1st January is no great shakes for me. It was many years ago now, and I came to terms with it a long time ago, but I can recall every minute of that morning as though it was yesterday.

This year will be forever remembered by those who are grieving, not able to visit hospitals, not allowed to arrange funerals, and those that were able to, had only few people present with no 'wake' afterwards. A truly awful year.
 
I am so glad to see the end of 2020 along with the rest of the world. I hope that 2021 will be a much better one for us all.

On a personal note I am feeling down, as my Mum's Alzheimer's is worsening, and she is so confused, and she misses my Dad so much. There is, obviously, only one way her story/life is going to end, as does everyone's, but watching Mum steadily decline over the last few months is unbearable. Her not knowing what day or month it is, and slowly, but inevitably, losing a bit of herself every day is hard. She will possibly very soon forget who my sister and I are. I would not wish this disease on anyone.

Anyway, on a happier note, Merry Christmas to you all.
 
Anna said:
I am so glad to see the end of 2020 along with the rest of the world. I hope that 2021 will be a much better one for us all.

On a personal note I am feeling down, as my Mum's Alzheimer's is worsening, and she is so confused, and she misses my Dad so much. There is, obviously, only one way her story/life is going to end, as does everyone's, but watching Mum steadily decline over the last few months is unbearable. Her not knowing what day or month it is, and slowly, but inevitably, losing a bit of herself every day is hard. She will possibly very soon forget who my sister and I are. I would not wish this disease on anyone.

Anyway, on a happier note, Merry Christmas to you all.
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It is such a difficult and heartbreaking situation, it is over 25 years since I went through my Mother having Dementia and she was moved from hospital into a Nursing Home on Christmas Eve and I was told not to visit as it would be better for her to settle in.Whether that was right or not?I had counselling at the time and was told I was going through a bereavement process because the person you know is no longer there.Nothing anyone can say can make the situation any easier but take as much help and support as you can, we have never met but my thoughts are with you.SFxx
 
Silver Fox said:
It is such a difficult and heartbreaking situation, it is over 25 years since I went through my Mother having Dementia and she was moved from hospital into a Nursing Home on Christmas Eve and I was told not to visit as it would be better for her to settle in.Whether that was right or not?I had counselling at the time and was told I was going through a bereavement process because the person you know is no longer there.Nothing anyone can say can make the situation any easier but take as much help and support as you can, we have never met but my thoughts are with you.SFxx
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Thank you Silver Fox for your kind words. They mean a lot. x
 

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