Random musings and general banter.

[historymystery]

Every word Our Sal utters is like a pearl, she's articulate, she's mellow and restrained, she's clear and concise.......and I'm drunk

Sally Jacks is presenting a Fabulift hour and just said, direct quote:-

"You can have 10 to 15 years knocked off you but don't forget as soon as you take this off everything goes back to normal but it's better than going into the Operating Theatre and being operated on err to get those kind of results, or maybe putting err the err needles in your skin and then, well, TO BE HONEST when everyone has that work done they ALL look the same'

So I'm guessing they are possibly behaving on Ideal World much the same as on Bid?

You would perhaps think they'd have learned their lesson, perhaps not! :mysmilie_10:

 

[Greg]

Every word Our Sal utters is like a pearl, she's articulate, she's mellow and restrained, she's clear and concise.......and I'm drunk

Quite honestly, Sally Jaxx is better off selling her market stall handbags on her crappy You Tube channel than embarrasing herself doing this!

 

[shopperholic]

Every word Our Sal utters is like a pearl, she's articulate, she's mellow and restrained, she's clear and concise.......and I'm drunk

Yesh ach, I absholutely agree. :mysmilie_3:

 

[Adam82]

About time shopping channels had stock 1 for phone lines only, 2 for web shop only.So two separate stock, get with internet age shopping channels.

 

[historymystery]

The only way to watch Our Sal is with a few drinks inside you - she then seems to make sense, which is a rare occurrence, as we all know:glass::mysmilie_3::mysmilie_3:

Yesh ach, I absholutely agree. :mysmilie_3:

 

[Muttley]

I am not at work today. I wish I was as I would not have heard the following comment. I had just switched on to the gardening hour with Angela and Howard. The first words he uttered were "the horse manure is selling well"... Can he not find something apart from bowels to talk about?

 

[historymystery]

Thanks, Muttley! You've cheered up my morning - I'm laughing out loud here and dribbling at the same time (not a pretty sight - sorry - just returned from dentist's with a numb side of face). Coming on here and reading everyone's posts is guaranteed to cheer you up - it always works for me! Don't tell me he brought the horse on as well? Mind you, you'd get more sense out of the horse than 'Poward'.

I am not at work today. I wish I was as I would not have heard the following comment. I had just switched on to the gardening hour with Angela and Howard. The first words he uttered were "the horse manure is selling well"... Can he not find something apart from bowels to talk about?

 

[Wirral70]

Paul McKenna's best friend* Howard The Human Senna Pod is selling some ladies clothes and says:-

"And I do think on a first date it's important not to show too much cleavage'

That must be why he favours wearing tight Turtle Neck Jumpers when on a night out in Cardiff :mysmilie_59:


* Howard has all Paul McKenna's books. This means, to Howard's mind, he's his 'friend'.

 

[Muttley]

Thanks, Muttley! You've cheered up my morning - I'm laughing out loud here and dribbling at the same time (not a pretty sight - sorry - just returned from dentist's with a numb side of face). Coming on here and reading everyone's posts is guaranteed to cheer you up - it always works for me! Don't tell me he brought the horse on as well? Mind you, you'd get more sense out of the horse than 'Poward'.

The dentist? Oh you poor thing, I am so sympathetic, I really hate going! Whenever I am feeling low I love to read the comments here, they really cheer you up don't they! As for the horse, I didn't watch long enough, after that comment I quickly changed channels. I am used to "20% of the stock has gone", "the lines are very busy", "check out your basket now", but I wasn't expecting comments about horse manure even on a gardening programme. It may be my ignorance - I live in a flat and don't have a garden.

 

[Muttley]

Hello peeps, I haven't posted in ages nor watched much of Bid sorry Ideal World but ...............

it's 8am and GOLLUM has just introduced the rarely available Halogen Oven with this line, and I quote directly:-

"Before you go off and do the school run I have got THE best reason why you might be late this morning getting the kids in on time.

FORGET ON TIME, think about saving time, think about saving energy and saving money when you're cooking the food for the people you love the most'

What an irresponsible little man, nothing changes :mysmilie_10:

Hi Wirral, nice to see you back. As you can see many of the bad practices of Bid have transferred to IW with the hiring of certain staff. However, we haven't seen Worry Angels (yet...) and the only artwork seen is Thomas Kinkade, we haven't seen the wildlife artist Stephen Gayford but if you wanted one I'm sure eBay have plenty for a fiver.

Love the quote about a good excuse for your kids being late for school - I'm sure the school would love the excuse "I was watching the telly so the kids are late". That would really create a good impression wouldn't it!

 

[Mommabear]

Just found some good news that'll cheer you up if you're a bit down.................Pervo is back at the end of the month :mysmilie_455:

Nice to see you Wirral :wave:

 

[Muttley]

Just found some good news that'll cheer you up if you're a bit down.................Pervo is back at the end of the month :mysmilie_455:

Nice to see you Wirral :wave:

Cheers Mommabear, that has really cheered me up..... But I shan't blame the messenger.

 

[Mommabear]

Cheers Mommabear, that has really cheered me up..... But I shan't blame the messenger.

The bearer of glad tidings, that's me! I'm so happy I could burst :mysmilie_514:

Sorry Mutters

 

[historymystery]

Thanks, Mutts. I only asked because Howard talks mainly horse sh.. at the best of times, so I thought he could cut out the middleman (where have I heard that before?) and go straight to the horse. Interesting that Howard was given this one to present - perhaps someone was getting their revenge and hoping he'd fall in it (literally!).

The dentist? Oh you poor thing, I am so sympathetic, I really hate going! Whenever I am feeling low I love to read the comments here, they really cheer you up don't they! As for the horse, I didn't watch long enough, after that comment I quickly changed channels. I am used to "20% of the stock has gone", "the lines are very busy", "check out your basket now", but I wasn't expecting comments about horse manure even on a gardening programme. It may be my ignorance - I live in a flat and don't have a garden.

 

[historymystery]

It was a stupid comment for him to make, and smacks of sheer desperation to flog, but he no doubt thought it was funny. But with an IW presenter on-screen, who needs teachers and school? Just sit the kids down in front of Moikey Boi and they can listen to the fascinating story of his past career...it will give the kids something to aim for (and they'll be asleep in 5 minutes).

 

[Muttley]

It was a stupid comment for him to make, and smacks of sheer desperation to flog, but he no doubt thought it was funny. But with an IW presenter on-screen, who needs teachers and school? Just sit the kids down in front of Moikey Boi and they can listen to the fascinating story of his past career...it will give the kids something to aim for (and they'll be asleep in 5 minutes).

We should market him as a cure for insomnia...

 

[Muttley]

Thanks, Mutts. I only asked because Howard talks mainly horse sh.. at the best of times, so I thought he could cut out the middleman (where have I heard that before?) and go straight to the horse. Interesting that Howard was given this one to present - perhaps someone was getting their revenge and hoping he'd fall in it (literally!).

That would have been fun! It was just a bit of a shock - you are channel hopping, not really concentrating, and hear that the horse manure is selling fast!

 

[Muttley]

The bearer of glad tidings, that's me! I'm so happy I could burst :mysmilie_514:

Sorry Mutters

You are forgiven.

 

[Keep Going]

Oh dear that bald fellarrrrr (In his own words) is doing his damndest to flog a Polti Iron, now below are a few quotes from said bald fellarrrrr..

"Bev (the Polti rep) is not here for monetary gain.....no no she is 'ere for the benefit of you, to make life easier for you at home, this is not about making money or sales" Superdooper thank you bald fellarrrrr in that case can we all have one each for free???

"Do you realise the amount of bugs, diseases, dustmite's and the like that are in the home? you could become ill because of them!!! get this iron today" Do me a real favour and stop taking the general public for complete mugs and yet again preying on the vulnerable......................yes you do prey on the vulnerable no matter how much the facts insult you!!!

As I have typed all of the above said bald fellarrrrr has managed to get alll the usual bullshit bingo catchphrases in, "Guys these are flying" "This is unbelieavble 70% Stock gone" "these were supposed to last the week!!!!!" "hurry guys empty those baskets I dont want you missing out" "please dont buy just give it a try you have nowt to lose" "darrrrrling this darrrrrrling that blah blah blah" "we are stupid busy now!!!" "you'd be daft not to buy"..........................I really love that last catchphrase, how to offend any potential punters by suggesting they maybe lacking intelligence for not buying a product, yip cheers thats the way to go you very (non) lovable saleman!!

All my humble facts that I have picked up direct from IW TV.

PS now in the next hour he is walking around the studio in what looks like a well used 8 year olds batman costume with a "magic" mobile vibrapower belt on, you have to see this :mysmilie_14::call:

 

[Wirral70]

Look at GOLLUM

I didn't realise how tiny he is, bless his little poly cotton socks :mysmilie_59: