Loveinamist
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Is DB single now???
Lola, have you been on your hols. with the PraiGuruGoddess woman on Mars?
Is DB single now???
Lola, have you been on your hols. with the PraiGuruGoddess woman on Mars?
Ahhh, you found me out! Sooooo is she? Always thought hubby was well fit and thought she'd got a corker there!
Yes, went to Africa and never came back.
I did know he went to Africa but didn't know they'd split - goodness me!
Can You Feel The Shove Tonight? - Ali Young
You Only Sieve Twice - Simon Brown
Raindrops Keep fallin' On My Bread - simon Brown
Between The Devil And The Deep Blue Twee - Claire S
Titty Titty Bang Bang - Julia
Bohemian Rats For Tea - Simon Brown
You'll Never Walk A Gnome - Richard Jackson
I Was Born Under A Wandering Scar - Ali Young
If I Were A Stitch Man - Lenny
It's Only Curds And Curds are All I Have To Take Your Tart away - Simon Brown
Let's Face The Muesli And Dance - Simon Brown
Dancing With My Elf - Richard Jackson or J. Kirk
Don't Go Changing To try to Wheeze Me - Jill F
The way We Fur - Basso
Your Styes are The Styes Of A Woman In Love - Ali Young
The Green, Green Gas Of Home - Catherine H
Goodbye Ruby Bruise Day - Ali Young
To Cut A Long Pastry Short I Lost my Rind - Simon Brown
Scalp Me Rhonda - Michael Di Cesare
I Know i'll Never Love This Hay again - Richard Jackson
I've Got Flu babe - Jill F
Rashes To Rashes - ali Young
Don't Rain On My Pomade - Philip Kingsley
Help Me Bake It Through The Night - Simon Brown
You're Breaking My Tart Cause You're Leaving - Simon Brown
If I Said You Had A Beautiful Noddy Would You Hold It Against Me? - J. Kirk or Richard Jackson
It Was Chest One Of Those things - Julia
I Miss The Hungry Leers - Basso
That's The Way Uh Huh Uh Huh i Like Nits - Philip Kingsley
Will You Still Shove Me Tomorrow? Lee from BE
I'll Be Seeing You In All The Old Familiar Laces - Michelle Hope
Another One Bites The Crust - Simon Brown
Don't Turn Around You Just Might see Me Fry - Simon Brown
For The Mud Times- Richard Jackson
You Took The Words Right Out Of my Mouth (It Must Have Been While You Were Hitting me) - Lee from BE
Every Sting Is Beautiful - Ali Young
I Just Called To Say I Love stew - Simon Brown
Ebony And I've A Wee - Claire or Catherine
It's So Funny How We Don't Stalk Any Cores - Simon Brown
Bridge Over Troubled Slaughter - Ali Young
South Of The Larder Down Mexico Way - Simon Brown
You've Got To Hide Your Loaf Away - Simon Brown
The Oven Times They Are A Changin' - Simon Brown
Save All Your Quiches For Me - Ann D
The bun Ain't Gonna Dine Anymore - Simon Brown
Nothing's Quite As Pretty As Fairy In The Morning - J. Kirk
Rake It To The Limit One more Time - Richard Jackson
The Glitterest Pill Is Hard To Swallow - J Kirk or Dawn B
Violence Is Golden - Ali Young
To Fur With Love - basso
To Stir With Love - Simon Brown
I Feel Titty - Julia
When A Flan Loves a Woman - Simon Brown
On The Wheat Where You Sieve - Simon Brown
Total Eclipse Of The Tart - Simon Brown
Doughnut Forsake Me Oh My Darling - Ann D
Come Fry With Me - Simon Brown
I'm Getting Sentimental Over Lu(lu) - Ali Young
The Fairy Thought Of You - J Kirk
What now My Loaf? - Simon Brown
As Long As He Weeds Me - Richard Jackson
The House Of The Rising buns - Simon Brown
I Close My Pies And Count To ten - Simon Brown
Oooo, I Hear Laughter In The Grain - Simon Brown
My Grill's Mad At Me - Simon Brown
These Foolish Rings Remind Me Of You - Dale
I Left My Tart In San Francisco - Simon Brown
Brown Pearl In The Ring - Ralph from Honora
I Should Have Known Butter - Simon Brown
Make It One For My Baby And One More For The Toad In The Hole - Simon Brown
The Creams Of The Everyday Housewife - Ali Young
Knowing Me, Knowing Lu - Ali Young
Whisk Me Up Before You Go Go - Simon Brown
What a Difference A Pay Makes - QVC customer
Make It Easy(pay) On Yourself.(Twice) - QVC Accounts Dept
You've Got To Hide Your Loaf Away - Simon Brown
To All The Grills I've Loved Before - Simon Brown
Spot's New, Pussycat? - Ali Young
It's A Shin - Ali Young
The bigger they Come The Harder They Small - Julia
When The Hoeing Gets Tough (The Tough Get Hoeing) - Richard Jackson
The Female Of The Species Is deadlier Than The Kale - Richard Jackson
It's My Party and I'll Cry If I Want Glue - Dawn B
Mammaries are Made Of This - Julia
It's My Pilates and I'll Try If I Want Ooooooooooo - Julia
Heart Of Gas - Catherine
You Have Placed A Quill In my Heart - Quacker Factory loony
Are You Lonesome To Fight? - Ali Young
Return To Bender - Uri Geller
Can You Hear The Crumbs, Fernando? - Simon Brown
The ironic thing is I've never even seen the man, but foodie puns are about the easiest, I think!
I think I'll approach him and offer to be his agent, and who knows how much money we'll make from what's sure to be a fantastically successful musical venture. I'm thinking the album might be called A Stew Of My Favourite Things. Or, perhaps, The Dinner Takes It All...
I can imagine Mr Brown seeing this and saying, "Who's this ruddy ipussclaws person? Anyone know where she lives? Where? Shady Pines, Twilight Home For the Terminally Bewildered? Well, send her a ruddy writ.
Voice off-stage: "But Simon, the album's just gone straight into the charts at number one!
Simon: Has it?! Oh, well, forget the writ. Send her a cheque for a fiver in commission or, better still, see if you can get away with £4.99...And find me a stylist; no, not soddin' Glen Campbell, I'm not wearing a little pink cardy whether it's this season's ruddy story or not, and I am definitely not teaming it with a little trouser and a blasted Birkenstock. Now, let me see, what other songs can I do? Hmmm, I'll make a list-ette:
Cassoulet All Your Love On Me
I'm Getting Curried In The Morning
Frying Without Wings
Papa Don't Poach
I Could Have Minced All Night
In The Wee Small Flours Of The Morning
The Days Of Wine And Hovis
Ziggy Starcrust
Never Known A Grill Like You Before
You Say Good Pie And I Say Jello
I Know It's Only Casserole But I Like It
Remember You're A Crumble
You Won't Go To Heaven If You Break My Tart
Can't Take My Pies Off You
We Don't Fry Out Loud
You Don't Have To say You Love Meat
My Tart Will Go On
It Only Happens When I Mince With You
From Russia With Loaves
You Can't Curry Loaf
She's Got Eggs She Knows How To Use Them
You're The Scone That I Want
When You Whisk Upon A Star
We'll Eat Again
You Can't Curry Loaf
Sieve and Let Fry
Rock around The Stock
I Wonder Who's Whisking Her Now
Hello, Is It Me You're Cooking For?
I Talk To The Teas But They Don't Listen To Me
Dancing Bean
Take These Grains From My Tart And set Me Free
Nearer My Cod To Thee
Egg Tide
Don't Chop Till You Get Enough
I Want Stew, I Need Stew, I Love Stew
Why Have You Left The Scone You Left Me For?
If You Wanna Be My Liver
The Ballad Of John And Coco
Saving All My Loaf For Stew
The Zest Is Yet To Come