MeMike Mason has time to finish his book now

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From what i've seen we'll need to get their posts sent to Bletchley Park to decode them, they're so illegible they resemble hieroglyphics.

I think it's fair to say their standard of grammar is up there with Gollum's, no wonder Madina speaks for him :mysmilie_59:

"That's defamation of charactah that is...and I dont loik that awight?"


Edit....Carrickter...sorry!
 
I think your observation re Bletchley Park may be nearer to the truth than you think. The terms and conditions of the usability of the £10 vouchers are still a mystery to me and lots of other people who bought on the promise of a £10 voucher. Another nail in the long list of B$ dished out by them. They won't be missed by me.

Wasn't it odd that they never bothered offering the £10 vouchers again after we conclusively proved, in black and white, that they were indeed a load of bull.

Good grief what a ghastly, desperate group of shysters they were. I'm so sad for the blameless ones but I can't and won't deny that i'm delighted that certain grotesques have been stopped from polluting the living rooms of Britain with their appalling spiel.
 
"That's defamation of charactah that is...and I dont loik that awight?"


Edit....Carrickter...sorry!

Merry can I just say that your post is positively Chaucer-Esque compared to what i've seen over there :mysmilie_59:
 
So he's raiding the little'uns bookshelf now...he'll be starting on the Popeye dvd collection next ;)

Actually, I have it on good authority that the book he is learning to read is a Janet and John book. It is the one where John gets the sack from a low rent TV shopping channel for behaving like an ignorant tattooed idiot! He comes home and Janet throws him out of the house. Poor John...
 
Wasn't it odd that they never bothered offering the £10 vouchers again after we conclusively proved, in black and white, that they were indeed a load of bull.

Good grief what a ghastly, desperate group of shysters they were. I'm so sad for the blameless ones but I can't and won't deny that i'm delighted that certain grotesques have been stopped from polluting the living rooms of Britain with their appalling spiel.

.....and they were craftier than you think with those horrid vouchers. The only one time I decided that I'd try and "cash one in" was for a throw I wanted it was £14.99 so a rare opportunity to buy, as we all know how all the prices miraculously dropped to £9.99 during these times...but guess what.....Due to "quality issues", they were unable to send it to me and would not be charging me! mmmmm - I didn't even bother trying to find out whether my "voucher" would be reinstated to use on something else as it would have cost time and money to find out and frankly the answer would probably have been no! Having a language barrier between customer and operator wasn't very encouraging either. Yes they could speak English, but a bare minimum!
 
Wasn't it odd that they never bothered offering the £10 vouchers again after we conclusively proved, in black and white, that they were indeed a load of bull.

Good grief what a ghastly, desperate group of shysters they were. I'm so sad for the blameless ones but I can't and won't deny that i'm delighted that certain grotesques have been stopped from polluting the living rooms of Britain with their appalling spiel.

I'm with you 100% on that. Desperate and shameless in their lack of ethics. Nasty, cynical con-merchants. I am glad that sorry disgraceful outfit are no more.
 
.....Don't know about you but I was always expecting him to let a swear word slip on on air...especially the "F word", only because I can well imagine that it's a word he bandies around in general conversation!
 
Has Mike and his missus/godslashthingy signed up for horse porn work yet?? :mysmilie_458:
 
I hope that Mike has stocked up on that men's cologne "that feaks him out as it is so similiar to his very expensive cologne" as he probably can't afford that now. Also he claims to buy Chanel No 5 for his goddess, but surely Divine Decadence is a lot cheaper and just as good apparently...
 
.....Don't know about you but I was always expecting him to let a swear word slip on on air...especially the "F word", only because I can well imagine that it's a word he bandies around in general conversation!

Not in front of a laydee! He opens car doors!! Hes a right gent gov' an' no mistake! An' I 'ave that on good aufority!
 
Not in front of a laydee! He opens car doors!! Hes a right gent gov' an' no mistake! An' I 'ave that on good aufority!

Well he'll be opening a lot of car doors if he ends up stood on the step of a Hotel, dressed in his Viscose Uniform :mysmilie_59:

uniform.jpg
 
Can you imagine 'carry your bag sir? Don't mean the wife by the way heheheh!' No tip there then.......
 
Can you imagine 'carry your bag sir? Don't mean the wife by the way heheheh!' No tip there then.......

It's just as well he dosen't smoke anymore. Imagine the sight of Gollum having a few tokes on the step of The Dorchester?

SmokingGollum.jpg
 
It's just as well he dosen't smoke anymore. Imagine the sight of Gollum having a few tokes on the step of The Dorchester?

View attachment 10427

Quite honestly, if Mike Mason came up to me outside the Dorchester doing a 'Me ole bamboo' dance with a Dick Van Dyke 'Awight mate' I'd find it hard not to give him an almighty Pie 'n' Mash 'lunch' into the Thames.
 
Quite honestly, if Mike Mason came up to me outside the Dorchester doing a 'Me ole bamboo' dance with a Dick Van Dyke 'Awight mate' I'd find it hard not to give him an almighty Pie 'n' Mash 'lunch' into the Thames.

I think we're more likely to find Gollum doing the overnight shift on the Reception of some highly dubious B&B in Deptford than The Dorchester :mysmilie_59:
 
You're probably right Muttley.

And he wouldn't portray a very good image either, would he? :mysmilie_59:

He may have a future with a big hotel. After all, the bins won't empty themselves. I can just see him as a Cockney binman, with his *** hanging out of his norf and sarf (mouth to non Londoners). Gawd blimy Guv'nor.
 
He may have a future with a big hotel. After all, the bins won't empty themselves. I can just see him as a Cockney binman, with his *** hanging out of his norf and sarf (mouth to non Londoners). Gawd blimy Guv'nor.

If I was Gollum i'd choose to see this as an opportunity. The world is his Oyster, which is just as well as with his very limited skillset he won't be able to afford Oysters.

He'll be lucky to dine on Frozen Kippers :mysmilie_59:

kippers.jpg
 

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