Random musings and general banter.

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Duke of Cheese said:
Oh God…He’s found us…

View attachment 29816
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To be fair,I am guessing that Unideal World has expanded the business into Greece and he is the head of operations out there.

You will find him on the beach,you know,one of the those really annoying beach sellers selling absolute crap(towel pegs,beach towels,parasols,high end watches et al). All the stuff he usually tries to flog from a studio will be sold on the beach..yes Ideal World have found their level!
They just knew there was a market for the all their tat…I can see it now headlines around the world ‘Greek beach goers perish in the Mediterranean from unscrupulous beach sellers flogging inflatable kayaks and chainsaws’ 😁
 
These two con artists talking about a watch worth thousands.Limited stock and really busy. 🤣 🤣
Screenshot 2024-09-22 at 12-56-35 Ideal World Live Stream - Watch TV Shopping Channel.png
 
Jazzydrury said:
Janice was never like this on Create and Craft, his Induction week at IW must have been ******** Training
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Re the bags I referenced earlier, he's clearly implying they are equal to the quality of bags that sell for MUCH more. He's asserting a couple of bags being flogged for £40 are the same quality as bags that sell for THOUSANDS.

Maybe I'd be proved wrong, however I'd love their bags to be put alongside tier one branded bags, all labels removed. Then get experts to compare them. If the experts say 'hard to tell any discernible difference' then I'd happily eat my words.

However, I somehow doubt that would be the outcome ;)
 
Plumbing the depths now. Paul selling socks! Not any old socks though,these are Bench socks! ( a whopping 15% of the price is p&p)

Well,no,I really couldn’t buy these..
Can you just imagine I’m in the pub and the lads get a whiff of my Gammon and see my Swan & Edgar which I’m flaunting and the next thing I’m hurled to the floor.

I wake up in A&E and a sympathetic Police Officer says “ sorry to tell you Mr Scraping the barrel but they ran off with the watch and bottle of Gammon from your pocket,but even worse,they nicked your Bench socks off your feet”
“God no!” I exclaimed
“Luckily I’ve got 6 more pairs at home courtesy of Ideal World”

“Well no you haven’t” said Pc Simon “Not only did they nick your watch ok,not only did they nick your perfume ok not only your socks ok but this is an organised crime gang and they knew you had more of the same in your bedside cabinet and they’ve entered your home and nicked them as well as 500 canes10 Polti vacs and 100 air fryers ok,alright”

I was devastated until WPC Gladys appeared and said “Whoop whoop,go go go I’ve got loads you can have”

Luckily for me it was all a bad dream. Taught me a lesson though.My Bench socks are in a bank safe,an investment,if you will(a Masonism there) never to be worn

Be so advised(another smarmy creepy sickly Masonism,if you will)…ugh
 
Last edited:
Scraping the barrel said:
Plumbing the depths now. Paul selling socks! Not any old socks though,these are Bench socks! ( a whopping 15% of the price is p&p)

Well,no,I really couldn’t buy these..
Can you just imagine I’m in the pub and the lads get a whiff of my Gammon and see my Swan & Edgar which I’m flaunting and the next thing I’m hurled to the floor.

I wake up in A&E and a sympathetic Police Officer says “ sorry to tell you Mr Scraping the barrel but they ran off with the watch and bottle of Gammon from your pocket,but even worse,they nicked your Bench socks off your feet”
“God no!” I exclaimed
“Luckily I’ve got 6 more pairs at home courtesy of Ideal World”

“Well no you haven’t” said Pc Simon “Not only did they nick your watch ok,not only did they nick your perfume ok not only your socks ok but this is an organised crime gang and they knew you had more of the same in your bedside cabinet and they’ve entered your home and nicked them as well as 500 canes10 Polti vacs and 100 air fryers ok,alright”

I was devastated until WPC Gladys appeared and said “Whoop whoop,go go go I’ve got loads you can have”

Luckily for me it was all a bad dream. Taught me a lesson though.My Bench socks are in a bank safe,an investment,if you will(a Masonism there) never to be worn

Be so advised(another smarmy creepy sickly Masonism,if you will)…ugh
Click to expand...
Better look after the Bench undercrackers, you wouldn't want to be left knickerless! 🤣🤣
 
Scraping the barrel said:
Plumbing the depths now. Paul selling socks! Not any old socks though,these are Bench socks! ( a whopping 15% of the price is p&p)

Well,no,I really couldn’t buy these..
Can you just imagine I’m in the pub and the lads get a whiff of my Gammon and see my Swan & Edgar which I’m flaunting and the next thing I’m hurled to the floor.

I wake up in A&E and a sympathetic Police Officer says “ sorry to tell you Mr Scraping the barrel but they ran off with the watch and bottle of Gammon from your pocket,but even worse,they nicked your Bench socks off your feet”
“God no!” I exclaimed
“Luckily I’ve got 6 more pairs at home courtesy of Ideal World”

“Well no you haven’t” said Pc Simon “Not only did they nick your watch ok,not only did they nick your perfume ok not only your socks ok but this is an organised crime gang and they knew you had more of the same in your bedside cabinet and they’ve entered your home and nicked them as well as 500 canes10 Polti vacs and 100 air fryers ok,alright”

I was devastated until WPC Gladys appeared and said “Whoop whoop,go go go I’ve got loads you can have”

Luckily for me it was all a bad dream. Taught me a lesson though.My Bench socks are in a bank safe,an investment,if you will(a Masonism there) never to be worn

Be so advised(another smarmy creepy sickly Masonism,if you will)…ugh
Click to expand...
In your dream did this happen six days a week and twice on Sundays? (Another Masonism to add to your collection).

I'd like an answer "but I'm not trying to rush you guys" (so many hilarious catchphrases to choose from)
 

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