Bizarre. I am a nurse and NHS hospitals are not hotels, where patients check in and out whenever they want! You an just imagine the conversation.
"I am in a rush now nurse places to go, jade to shift". "Absolutely Mr Troth, we understand you are a busy and very important man. We don't want to pin you down but do you have a rough estimate you may be returning"? "Well, I have a lot of verbal diarrhoea and clocks to inflict on my discerning colletors but I hope to be back by around 9pm". "Perfect, I will make sure night staff have your bed all freshly made for you, extra pillows (plumped) and a nice warm Molton Brown bubble bath waiting". "You know I will need feeding right? My work is strenuous and I will be famished". "Yes, we have already sent a message to the kitchen to say you will be out for dinner. Chef Gordon Ramsey will have you a delicious steak and chips, prepared to your liking and delivered for your supper". "Sounds okay but steak might be a bit heavy, I will have to see how hungry I feel when I return"." Would you like a light supper of smoked salmon, capers and salad preparing as a standby alternative, should you only require a light bite?" "Hmmm, it ustn't be sitting in the fridge for more than 15 minutes. Also, the salmon must be procured from Fortnum & Mason. If not, Harrod's will have to suffice". "Just leave it all to us Mr Troth, we do this all the time. Now, about your hemorrhoids (please excuse this vulgar talk), we have cancelled your procedure tomorrow morning because we have noted that you will be away from the hospital fom 9am until 5pm. However, Mr Cutter, Ms Snooze and the theatre team have confirmed that will all stay as late as you require. They will be ready to go ahead whenever you are ready".
What a total crock!
