My Mum used to say 'all my eye and Betty Martin' if she thought someone was spinning a tale. 'Always had his/her back teeth awash' was someone who liked their booze (think this was a Norfolk saying, but not sure, as was 'hair like a pound of wax candles'). 'Doesn't know the letter A from a bull's foot' was another for someone who behaved stupidly.
My OH had an elderly great-auntie who we used to secretly call 'Mrs. Malaprop' - you had to work out the real meaning of what she meant. Prime examples were a neighbour now home who had spent some time in 'expensive care' at the hospital (not funny for the neighbour, but so typical of auntie's conversation), and prices that were absorbent (she meant extortionate). Can't remember all of them and she was a lovely soul, so we used to often ache with trying not to laugh while we were there.