Really? On CVQ?? God help us all.
It may come as a huge surprise to know I cannot stand him. Not just his recent reported antics with the queueing story and others, but over the decades in general. Right from the early ‘80s when he was talking to that wretched puppet thing in his wombcupboard on the BBC, to his now role on This Morning (I switched off).
I wouldn‘t usually recommend Noel Edmonds’s Gotchas as a psychological profiling tool of note, but I would recommend you watch the one he did on Schofield at an early 1990s R1 Roadshow. Essentially, a hapless magician came (well not quite that exciting) on stage, with the old head in a wooden block plus cutting tool from above and a bucket at the front below trick. Pipmeister, on his knees, was the head to go in question. When it was all seemingly going to plan, you couldn’t have got a nicer more amenable stooge than Phil. Going along with it all…
At the end of the trick the key Gotcha element came to the fore, with the magician saying the key to open the device and let Schofield out again was failing to work, leaving Schofield stuck there on the floor with the impending live on the radio show to present in seconds. To say he then became not best pleased is an understatement. His facial expressions and way of speaking changed from the usually happy go lucky Phil to a bad tempered potentially foul mouthed and churlish individual. Of course, when Noel Edmonds came from behind and then revealed himself to Pipster, the matey smile and manner immediately reappeared again - just like somebody had switched on his ‘nice’ switch again. But for me, the nasty button was far more telling of him as a person in my view at least. As for his cars and his gins..You can shove them up something very narrow and very painful.