A belated Merry Christmas to all the bidsters out there, sorry I didn't come on yesterday, but I was too busy looking for the stones in my bid diamond ring, necklace and earring set that my hubby bought for me! By the time I got to open my presents, I was already half cut, so can you imagine the absolute shock on my face when I opened not only one, but three boxes of diamond jewellery, as I staggered around the room proudly showing all the rellies and guests my wonderful array of quality diamonds, I did wonder despite having six glasses of cava and a bottle of baileys on board, why everybody was peering so intently and closely at my finery, auntie Mary even used the little magnifying glass that she won earlier in a cracker bless her - then she is over 60! Anyway folks, worse for drink I went upstairs for a nap and when I awoke some three hours later with the sorest of heads, I peered down and the first thing I noticed was the stones in necklace where nowhere to be seen, it was the same with the ring, and I lurched over to the mirror and would you believe, it was the same story with the earrings? ......I was horrified, who could have taken them? I know I was pi$$ed but could one of my jealous guests gouged them out with their mini screwdriver set? could they have been switched whilst I was sleeping? - Maybe they were never there in the first place?! I searched high and low, trying not to arouse my husband's suspicion, he would have been furious at my carelessness, no joy sadly, so I slumped down into the armchair and tried to concentrate on the telly, when he said " I hope you love your present" - Eeek, I thought, Yes darling, I said, nice weather we've been having fgr the time of the year" - Yes, I got them all from Bid, you'd left the tv in the kitchen tuned to it a few weeks ago, I didn't realise what wonderful high end and designer products you can get for such low low prices - p&p's a bit of a bind but with such luxury brands on offer, I reckon it's a small price to pay!
"You got them from bid did you? I'm supposing that some oily toe rag in a three piece suit told you that the crown jewels had nothing on this bunch of tat! Not only have I shown every b'gger we know a set of jamboree bag jewellery, I've spent last hour on me hands and knees searching for something that would have stumped Sherlock Holmes even - Did Mary take that magnifying glass with her?
Anyway, that was yesterday - This is now - Merry Xmas bidders!
