Decluttering!

[maymorganlondon]

Interesting article in today's Guardian: https://www.theguardian.com/lifeand...ing-inspired-me-to-change-other-peoples-lives

I think most things which become excessive have an emotional / psychological root. I certainly accept that my issue is with letting go of the past, added to which I dislike waste. The decluttering road is a journey to rethinking my relationship with the past, and recalibrating my definition of waste.

I can recognise that it would be easy to go down the route of the father in the article, but I absolutely refuse to become more bogged down with things. It is hard work though, if you are overcoming decades of inability to part with anything associated with the pas... Particularly with departed loved ones.

 

[merryone]

I think most things which become excessive have an emotional / psychological root. I certainly accept that my issue is with letting go of the past, added to which I dislike waste. The decluttering road is a journey to rethinking my relationship with the past, and recalibrating my definition of waste.

I can recognise that it would be easy to go down the route of the father in the article, but I absolutely refuse to become more bogged down with things. It is hard work though, if you are overcoming decades of inability to part with anything associated with the pas... Particularly with departed loved ones.

My mum has sadly passed on, but before she died she was in a nursing home for some years and my son moved into her house to look after it, during this time with her being alive, we did actually go through everything, shredding old documents, informing the powers that be that she was in a nursing home now, so as to stop any more uneccessary mail coming into the house, we were able to tell her what we were doing at home and although she was suffering from dementia, she did understand and in moments of lucidity would talk about this openly and understood! Thankfully, my mother was not particularly a hoarder, and a short while before she started to go downhill, she'd had a fair few home improvements done. We kept a few keepsakes, like jewellery that I still have safe in my own jewellery box, but she wasn't particularly a one for jewellery and adornments, so there wasn't the huge job of trawling through stuff to keep and stuff to throw. Ornaments and trinkets, again, she wasn't into those either. There was a good amount of that sort of stuff though 'cause she inherited quite a bit when my nan died some years before...I remember my mum saying that she didn't want half of the stuff she was left with but didn't have the heart to get rid of it, and however much I tried to persuade her to donate and chuck some of it, she said it didn't seem right. However, after my mum had gone I did donate a lot of stuff...The krux of the matter is a lot of this sort of sensitive "culling" is a lot easier to do when the person is still alive! I realise that if the person is still alive and living at home, and is getting engulfed under a pile of clutter, it must be immensely difficult for family and loved ones to convince the person to get rid of it, as they'll always have some sentimental excuse as to why they want to keep it! (You only need to watch a few of those "hoarding shows" on tv to tell you that!). Then of course if they do die unexpectedly, then it, I would imagine be so much harder to get rid of stuff..."oh, she loved that, she wanted to keep that" and so on. I guess every case is different, and as much as I would have rather not seen my poor mum have to move into a nursing home - At least we got her "house in order" whilst she was still living! We even donated all her clothes and that sort of thing that were in good condition, so when she did finally pass, we didn't have the extra sad task of having to go through everything!

 

[merryone]

If hubby still has the receipt, maybe get him to take it back to the shop? Better on their shelves than yours, and better your money in your bank account than theirs!

Hope the sun shines for you in that deckchair! :mysmilie_59:

Sun shining at the mo, still got a bit of ironing which I'll do in a minute before I end up wasting any more of this lovely day. Don't have the receipt, he bought the offending toiletries with the weekly shop in the supermarket and to be fair it's all on his card, and too much effort to get there just to do that...just gotta try and train him into not buying duplicates of stuff we've already got...still got loads of crisps left, but thankully the packet's almost small enough to fit into one of the cupboards now! Gonna have to think of something to eat for lunch later (Not crisps lol!),that's a pain..can't be bothered, just wanna go out, can't afford to eat out sadly....oh well..ironing first, then lunch then out!

 

[maymorganlondon]

Sun shining at the mo, still got a bit of ironing which I'll do in a minute before I end up wasting any more of this lovely day. Don't have the receipt, he bought the offending toiletries with the weekly shop in the supermarket and to be fair it's all on his card, and too much effort to get there just to do that...just gotta try and train him into not buying duplicates of stuff we've already got...still got loads of crisps left, but thankully the packet's almost small enough to fit into one of the cupboards now! Gonna have to think of something to eat for lunch later (Not crisps lol!),that's a pain..can't be bothered, just wanna go out, can't afford to eat out sadly....oh well..ironing first, then lunch then out!

Maybe start an advance shopping list, and agree with hubby that if it's not on the list it stays at the shop? I get that the sheer hassle of going back just isn't worth it. Hope your plans for the day materialise. We have to enjoy every moment of fine weather.

 

[merryone]

Hi declutterers are we still at it? I'm still maintaining believe it or not. The only housework looming for me is an extremely small amount of ironing, and that's it...I'll do that tomorrow no rush! Hubby bulk bought a load of batteries the other day, but I undid every pack, thew away the packaging and put them all in a clear plastic bag with all the other clear plastic bags in the junk drawer, so I let him get away with that one! So happy to be "unexpected visitor ready". Decluttering has definitely been the most worthwhile thing I've done this year. Still open to any hints and tips, on storage solutions, anything really!

 

[stratobuddy]

Still can't get motivated to start. Nothing sentimental to worry about, just lots of expensive tech, far too good to give away, but I can't get around to selling it on Ebay (and lots of sellers get scammed too).

Just one item, one of my old synthesisers, is now a collectors item, and goes for up to £2000 on Ebay. But the thought of packing it all up and posting it to anywhere in the world is very daunting, as the best prices are from USA or Japan.

My main worry is that if someone has to eventually clear the house, they won't recognise the value of all my retro-tech. I even have a torch collection worth many hundreds, and I would sell most of it if I could get the right buyer.

 

[maymorganlondon]

Still can't get motivated to start. Nothing sentimental to worry about, just lots of expensive tech, far too good to give away, but I can't get around to selling it on Ebay (and lots of sellers get scammed too).

Just one item, one of my old synthesisers, is now a collectors item, and goes for up to £2000 on Ebay. But the thought of packing it all up and posting it to anywhere in the world is very daunting, as the best prices are from USA or Japan.

My main worry is that if someone has to eventually clear the house, they won't recognise the value of all my retro-tech. I even have a torch collection worth many hundreds, and I would sell most of it if I could get the right buyer.

It sounds like you need a specialist reseller. I know on eBay there are agency resellers who take a cut to resell items for you. I imagine also that bricks and mortar auctioneers have departments specialising in unlikely areas (is: not just art and antiques)...

Imagining what even family confronted with your collections will do is a good "stop and think" deterrent. I am planning a shopping trip for stuff to get rid of damp and damp smells. I might check out some clothes as I have some vouchers to spend which expire soon.

I have paperwork to go through and then filing it all - not an activity I look forward to... So I'm trying to reduce my paperwork to a bare minimum. I no longer have any unopened envelopes and plan to cancel some magazine subscriptions as well.

I've also now got space in my food recycling bin for stuff I ran out of room for when my guests arrived.

I'm just still ploughing through and watching YouTube vids for extra motivation.

Pleased to say that I too would not be embarrassed by unexpected visitors, Merryone.

 

[iloveshopping]

I've stopped as I have my tax return and need to do some other paperwork too but I should get back to at least a carrier bag a week to the charity shop.

 

[merryone]

Although I did this quite early on in the process, I thought it was a tip worth sharing anyway...and it's about carrier bags! I used to have a carrier bag holder hanging up in the kitchen stuffed to overflowing with bags, literally an enitre kitchen drawer stuffed full of heavy duty bags for life, normal bags for life and general carrier bags that wouldn't fit into the holder! When I remembered to take the stronger bags shopping, I would but normally forgot and ended up having to buy more, the other bags I would use to sort the recycling into. I have totally rationalised. I still have a bag holder which hangs at the bottom of the stairs in the hallway, so I can grab one when I go shopping, the heavy duty bags stay in the boot of the car when not in use... and as for the recycling..I ordered some special reusable bags which fold flat when not in use and they are hidden away at the bottom of the recycling boxes. Does anyone else still have cupboards and drawers full of plastic bags?

 

[stratobuddy]

Yes, at one time my "bags of bags" were full so I just chucked them in the cupboard, until eventually 100's spilled out whenever I upened the door.

And Tesco biodegradable ones just disintegrated into powder, which took ages to clear up the mess as it clogged my vac. And things that I'd carefully wrapped up to protect were now covered in powder and in much worse condition than if I hadn't put them in bags in the first place.

 

[pyjama princess]

.........And Tesco biodegradable ones just disintegrated into powder.......

I thought I had mice in the house when that happened to me LOL!

 

[maymorganlondon]

Although I did this quite early on in the process, I thought it was a tip worth sharing anyway...and it's about carrier bags! I used to have a carrier bag holder hanging up in the kitchen stuffed to overflowing with bags, literally an enitre kitchen drawer stuffed full of heavy duty bags for life, normal bags for life and general carrier bags that wouldn't fit into the holder! When I remembered to take the stronger bags shopping, I would but normally forgot and ended up having to buy more, the other bags I would use to sort the recycling into. I have totally rationalised. I still have a bag holder which hangs at the bottom of the stairs in the hallway, so I can grab one when I go shopping, the heavy duty bags stay in the boot of the car when not in use... and as for the recycling..I ordered some special reusable bags which fold flat when not in use and they are hidden away at the bottom of the recycling boxes. Does anyone else still have cupboards and drawers full of plastic bags?

I have a load of bags in the boot of the car. I used to have carrier bags in a dedicated holder which is now a white elephant. I have several Lakeland carrier bags,: the best on the market for quality and durability. I have several jute shoppers. 2x Tesco Orla Kiely ones, 3x Waitrose Emma Bridgwater ones and a nice simple seasonal winter one from Sainsburys. My recycling goes in one big bvag out to the single recycling bin. We don't sort it at all now. I used to save all plastic bags and carriers and take them to the supermarket recycling. 5p charge came in and all that stopped. Now it bitterly offends me but it goes to landfill. I don't buy new plastic bags, but there is so much polythene wrap, bags etc on so much we buy.

I had the disintegration problem with carrier bags. Reassuring that they do biodegrade, but that's faster than most of us would like!

My plans for the weekend never materialised as I decided to change my email password on Saturday morning. I still can't log into my email. I lost my internet connection, and only this evening got t'internet back. Still no email!

So will hope to have another go at restoring that tomorrow... And get back to the clutter at the weekend.

 

[merryone]

Found myself having a mini declutter this weekend...Crazy as it sounds a friend of mine traditionally holds a christmas dinner usually in June or july for her family and mine, it was a little late this year...we had it this saturday as we couldn't organise a suitable date earlier in the year. Now the idea is to make it as much like xmas as poss and to bring a small and naff christmas present. Now usually we'll wrap up a bottle of advocaat, or harvey's sherry...this year we gave them a soap on a rope and a pair of novelty socks each....OMG what did we get in return..almost as much clutter as I started with!!!! She said we've raided the charity shops and found some really naff stuff...so this is what we got to take home....a hideous totem pole statue, complete with a chip in it....a massive statue of a camel, a great big kid's puzzle book and some kind of drinking game! I mean talk about take the joke too far! The only good thing is that yes, in buying this stuff they've made a donation to a charity..but what does she honestly think I'm gonna do with all this stuff? To be fair I've already donated it lock stock and barrell to another charity shop... minus the broken thing which I binned - It's ok, they don't live in the same town as us! I really hope I'm not sounding like a killjoy here, but surely you can try and give someone a "funny" gift without giving them something so horrible the only place for it is the dustbin!!! At least the "gifts" we gave them are small and inobtrusive, they'll actually get some use out of them, even if they only wear the socks on xmas day or to the office party...and soap's soap isn't it? People are strange!!!

 

[stratobuddy]

Found myself having a mini declutter this weekend...Crazy as it sounds a friend of mine traditionally holds a christmas dinner usually in June or july for her family and mine, it was a little late this year...we had it this saturday as we couldn't organise a suitable date earlier in the year. Now the idea is to make it as much like xmas as poss and to bring a small and naff christmas present. Now usually we'll wrap up a bottle of advocaat, or harvey's sherry...this year we gave them a soap on a rope and a pair of novelty socks each....OMG what did we get in return..almost as much clutter as I started with!!!! She said we've raided the charity shops and found some really naff stuff...so this is what we got to take home....a hideous totem pole statue, complete with a chip in it....a massive statue of a camel, a great big kid's puzzle book and some kind of drinking game! I mean talk about take the joke too far! The only good thing is that yes, in buying this stuff they've made a donation to a charity..but what does she honestly think I'm gonna do with all this stuff? To be fair I've already donated it lock stock and barrell to another charity shop... minus the broken thing which I binned - It's ok, they don't live in the same town as us! I really hope I'm not sounding like a killjoy here, but surely you can try and give someone a "funny" gift without giving them something so horrible the only place for it is the dustbin!!! At least the "gifts" we gave them are small and inobtrusive, they'll actually get some use out of them, even if they only wear the socks on xmas day or to the office party...and soap's soap isn't it? People are strange!!!

Re your last sentence, and going off at a tangent, can anyone remember a Radio Luxembourg programme hosted in his very early career by Bob Monkhouse called "People are funny"? Or did I imagine it?

 

[merryone]

I've googled it strato...but can't find anything...and definitely don't remember it myself...I was more of a radio 1 girl in my time..but show or no show....yes...people are most certainly funny!

 

[maymorganlondon]

Found myself having a mini declutter this weekend...Crazy as it sounds a friend of mine traditionally holds a christmas dinner usually in June or july for her family and mine, it was a little late this year...we had it this saturday as we couldn't organise a suitable date earlier in the year. Now the idea is to make it as much like xmas as poss and to bring a small and naff christmas present. Now usually we'll wrap up a bottle of advocaat, or harvey's sherry...this year we gave them a soap on a rope and a pair of novelty socks each....OMG what did we get in return..almost as much clutter as I started with!!!! She said we've raided the charity shops and found some really naff stuff...so this is what we got to take home....a hideous totem pole statue, complete with a chip in it....a massive statue of a camel, a great big kid's puzzle book and some kind of drinking game! I mean talk about take the joke too far! The only good thing is that yes, in buying this stuff they've made a donation to a charity..but what does she honestly think I'm gonna do with all this stuff? To be fair I've already donated it lock stock and barrell to another charity shop... minus the broken thing which I binned - It's ok, they don't live in the same town as us! I really hope I'm not sounding like a killjoy here, but surely you can try and give someone a "funny" gift without giving them something so horrible the only place for it is the dustbin!!! At least the "gifts" we gave them are small and inobtrusive, they'll actually get some use out of them, even if they only wear the socks on xmas day or to the office party...and soap's soap isn't it? People are strange!!!

The best tip for gift-giving as we get older is either something we need and will definitely use (eg: if you've broken your last wine glass, a new set will be welcome) or something you will consume pretty well instantly... flowers, chocolates, alcohol, bath/body smellies. One of my faves to give is an experience... now obviously that could be pricier - but choccies or a bottle of vino collapse would be easy enough to do on a budget, surely?

If so little real thought went into the gift, I don't see that you need have any pangs whatsoever in donating or binning the lot!

 

[merryone]

The best tip for gift-giving as we get older is either something we need and will definitely use (eg: if you've broken your last wine glass, a new set will be welcome) or something you will consume pretty well instantly... flowers, chocolates, alcohol, bath/body smellies. One of my faves to give is an experience... now obviously that could be pricier - but choccies or a bottle of vino collapse would be easy enough to do on a budget, surely?

If so little real thought went into the gift, I don't see that you need have any pangs whatsoever in donating or binning the lot!

The gift was "supposed to be awful"...but even so...you can do awful without giving the other person something that you know they'll have to find room for, or get rid of! It's like a joke xmas if you like, so yeah a pair of novelty socks, or a couple of hair scrunchies with holly on them would have sufficed ...at least they would have been useful! Hey ho, all gone now, house is back to it's tidy uncluttered state!

 

[maymorganlondon]

I've ground to a halt at present!
I know what I need to do but energy, social commitments or illness have snookered several earmarked weekends.

I need to get my mojo back :mysmilie_846:

 

[merryone]

I've ground to a halt at present!
I know what I need to do but energy, social commitments or illness have snookered several earmarked weekends.

I need to get my mojo back :mysmilie_846:

Me too..had one of my pet rats escape last week ..place turned upside down..caught her thankfully after two days out...but still trying to sort out the aftermath..Got guests staying at the weekend so I really do have to pull my finger out! Hope you get your mojo back! x

 

[Pick-a-Lily]

I had something of a lightbulb moment on Sunday, when emptying a bottle of ABC body wash that has been 'on the go' for what seems like ages. Naturally, I have two more waiting in the queue, plus a Lavender one and a refill pack...
A stash is only a stash if you can use it within a reasonable timescale, otherwise it's a hoard. :wait: