Dear alter - your words have really bothered me & I apologise in advance if this is sticking my nose in where it's not wanted. You don't have an excuse, you have reasons & you're NOT a ' complete boring mess'. Are you worried that someone grabbing your bag could knock you over? If not, & it's just the thought of someone taking it when you can't fight back, there are substantial, but still lightweight bags around - I've got one from Travleon & it even has a reinforced gusset (get that!). Jeans & Fitflops look great together, so do dark tops, especially when worn with a stylish scarf or jewellery. I don't know if you can't or won't wear the clothes in your wardrobe, however, surely some can be worn with jeans? As for passing yourself off as the cleaner, DON'T. By the way I don't have an issue with anyone being a domestic worker & often thought about doing it as a job. Please remember that you're the girl with eyes the colour of smoke, dolphins & baby elephants
Twi - thanks (once again) for your very kind words. I really do appreciate them - they give me a glow (if only that nice warm feeling would go to my feet!).
I won't wear a scarf any more (unless it's a heavy one in winter) as I was wearing a scarf when the yobs tried grabbing my bag. One of them had come up behind me and was pulling it as the other was going for my bag. I am a fighter and gave them a run for their money. They got nothing off me but a few hits from one of my crutches.
But it did make me realise how vulnerable I am when I venture out alone (extremely rare pre-Covid). My balance has got a lot worse over the last year, too, so I doubt I'd stay upright long enough to fight these days. I did start being more aware, thinking about where I was and positioning myself better. Also, being more reactive - which I think is key. I tried ignoring the yobs when I knew they were up to no good and I should have turned the situation around before it started.
I used to wear smart suits but stopped because when I was in serious nerve pain and had just discovered Fitflops, there was very little choice and they just looked so wrong with them.
Oh, the cleaner! I actually love being her. It's quite amazing how the door-to-door con artists lose interest quickly as soon as I tell them I'm the cleaner. We had a rash of gypsy-types coming around selling things/offering a new roof/tarmac/fencing/gutter cleaning and some of these were quite aggressive even to my partner (and he's a strapping lad but way too soft). Once these people realise I can't hand over money they get lost and go on to the next poor victim. It works like a charm every time. Some ask when the boss will be back but rarely return.
My Ring doorbell is also off-putting. I can't get to the door quickly but even if I'm upstairs I tell these unwanted tradesmen that I'm the cleaner, I'll be down now, just let me get my rubber gloves off they're gone before I get to the window to shout down.
I've never been timid but losing my mobility and a few nasty encounters with strangers who seem to think a woman on crutches is an easy mark has taken a toll on my confidence. There's no way I'll show it these days, though. It's direct eye contact, head up (actually quite difficult when I have to look at every step I take), shoulders squared and I do see them look twice. Advice I was given by a martial arts expert, along with a few crutch moves, that I won't forget as it really does work. I'd recommend it to any woman who finds herself in a situation that could turn nasty.
My friend is a professional cleaner and goes to work dressed to the nines. She gets quite upset with me for using 'the cleaner' persona. She absolutely loves cleaning and I really do take my hat off to all the cleaners/cleaning lovers out there as I do a good job but hate every minute spent doing it. So absolutely no offence meant to any cleaners out there.
PS reinforced gusset! The only one of those I really need these days is in my knickers
