I don't understand how people can't afford a pack of basic tampons. I went through a stage after my divorce where I was homeless and sofa surfing. I literally left with the clothes on my back and went to a refuge. Lots of people had donated toiletries and period products but even back then I'd noticed some women had refused to use opened packs. I was of the opinion that you don't look a gift horse in the mouth. I continue to donate to the refuge that helped me.
Even on the 'bones of my ar$e' as my mum would say, I never failed to keep up with basic hygiene. You could and still can buy supermarket brand products for a low price. I worked with a woman who lived 400 yards from me but I refused to give her a lift because she stank to high heaven. The manager asked her what the problem was (after many of us refused to work near her - she was that bad). She said there was no hot water or bath at home. So? Boil a kettle, fill a sink, use a soap and flannel. I wanted to be as little bother to my friends/family as I could when I relied on goodwill so this is what I did. I didn't want to add cost to their utility bills by using water and heat. I'd wash my smalls in the sink and hang them on their line to dry and use a laundrette once a week.
A 32-pack of tampons in Asda is £1.70. They'd last at least 2 periods for me. A 20-pack of maxi towels is 75p. I paid a fiver for my menstrual cup in Savers. The prices have doubled in the last 4 years but they're still affordable even on basic benefits. My next door neighbour has volunteered with the local food bank since Covid began. It'd been a real eye-opener for her. She says the same people who come in for their box are found 10 minutes later in the Costa a few doors down buying expensive coffee, feeding their kids extortionately priced toasties and cakes while playing with their latest iPhone!
Obviously, not everyone is like this but my neighbour says she's noticed that the few single men who use the bank are usually poorly dressed, unkempt and have an old phone. Unlike the women who are all dressed to the nines with fresh manicures and highlights (neighbour's words).
We live on a road of all private houses but the next street over is a rough estate. Two of the neighbours on our road have moved in from the estate - private houses being rented to the council. The single mother opposite has 3 kids by 2 fathers. She visits the bank every week but is a morning after school drop-off/afternoon after pick up daily visitor to Costa.
She costs the council a fortune as the fathers rarely turn up but when they do they're closely followed by the police as a visit always ends in a row where they turn up drunk t midnight, get violent and damage the house. The house owner isn't bothered as the council sorts all the damage. The single mum has been there several years but his other tenants have rarely lasted longer than 6 months at a time. Each tenant change sees the council arrive, rip out the carpets and replace and in the case of the last tenants (a seemingly single mum refugee with 6 kids but always has a load of adult males there), a new kitchen - the second in under 3 years.
None of this is any of my business nor is how people spend their money. But, seriously, stop moaning about lack of money and get your priorities straight. My opposite neighbour may be a one-off but her kids want for nothing. I doubt this has anything to do with the fathers. They would rather be the big I am and buy pointless expensive Christmas presents like drones and mini electric BMWs (that the youngest can't play with as he's too little and the oldest can't use as the mum refuses to supervise) rather than pay maintenance.
I honestly do not understand people these days. Why on earth would you wreck a kitchen or bathroom? Smash windows and break doors. Our newly-elected councillor got a little bit merry in the local pub and spouted out how much our council pays to repair deliberate damage. He also let us know how much the hanging baskets in the local town cost - let's just say I'd have done it for a tenth of the cost then gone on a Caribbean cruise with the rest! None of my business but ultimately rate-payers pay.
My food bank neighbour says the genuinely upsetting cases are the elderly people who have spent all their money helping younger relatives and are just a few quid short of getting extra benefits. They turn up thinking they'll get help but can't. It took me straight back to my childhood where my nan would give her meals on wheels to my uncle who had moved back in with her after divorce. He'd had 'compo' after a road accident left him slightly disabled. He spent all his money on booze and fags, abused my nan, ate her food and left her on the floor to go to the pub when she suffered a stroke.
Sorry. Rant over. I'm having a bad day at the hands of stupid people!
