The last time i looked, i was not a guy !

[Tangle foot]

I don't mind being called love. Coming from the Northwest l very often say it without thinking. Now math instead of maths drives me daft.

 

[loveallthingsitalian]

In a similar vein, the use of an 'x' (kiss) at the end of a reply from the QVC customer services on FB should be abolished. Very unprofessional imho. I also experienced this on a catalogue company's FB page when they were replying to a complaint! I mentioned it to their HO (whilst making my complaint) and they said it had been noted. I bet they still do it!!

Now there is something which I will NEVER see as ok.

I hate Babe which seems to be said particularly by Essex girls.

 

[thatu]

Babes is even worse. I don't mind any of the other terms of endearment, nor do I mind guys. Language changes all the time and guys could well be standard English in a few years' time.

 

[Weathergirl]

Oh please "guys" get a grip! It's fine by me.

 

[Bea Frugal]

Just this very evening we were out for dinner and the waiter, who was probably young enough to be my grandson, kept calling me sweetheart. I kept quiet but it really annoyed me. Just sounded so patronising, like I'm some fluffy old biddy, which I certainly am not!

I was sorting out some stuff with BT on the phone recently and they asked if they could call me by my first name. It seems to be part of their training, presumably hoping to part us more readily from our money if we are matey, but I hate that sort of familiarity with someone I'm never even going to meet. If they want to be polite then stick to good old fashioned manners.

 

[Brissles]

Happened to me too by a telephone cold caller. I told him my name was Mrs....... and he was welcome to call me that. I also hate being referred to or introduced to by my first name by toddlers and children, sorry if that upsets young Mums out there, but I was brought up to call any adult I didn't know as Mr or Mrs....... Even now, in my mid 60's at school reunions I cant bring myself to call my teachers (those that are still alive) by their first name. How times have changed.

(I don't have a problem with waiters/waitresses, but the difference in being served on the continent and in Britain is quite different)

 

[Vienna]

The only one which irritates me is " Hon ". DF calls all her buddies Hon on the back to you page and I daresay on the Queens page too. I hasten to add I`m not a member of either group !
It`s a word which is flung around the internet and I`ve had messages from people addressing me " Hi Hon ", grrrrrrrrrrr !

 

[Flamenco]

The only one which irritates me is " Hon ". DF calls all her buddies Hon on the back to you page and I daresay on the Queens page too. I hasten to add I`m not a member of either group !
It`s a word which is flung around the internet and I`ve had messages from people addressing me " Hi Hon ", grrrrrrrrrrr !

Same here, my top pet hate. And its other manifestation: "Hi hunny". Makes me apoplectic whenever I receive a message/text/email with that. I am not an illiterati.

 

[martin3645]

I think people ought to lighten up, it's only a terminology. It's not meant to be disrespectful, it's meant to be friendly without being too familiar.

 

[Tiddlywinks]

Yes, I agree, a lot of the waiters/waitresses appears to be students earning a crust - no problem with that at all, BUT I wonder about the professionalism of their Managers who give staff training. Surely a ban on 'guys', particularly when serving females should be highlighted, not left to the likes of my generation to pull them up about it.

The same applies to the young management in broadcasting - Americanism or not - its all about professionalism and good manners. I hardly think the Queen and her husband would be referred to as "you guys" when being served or spoken to.

Hmm, they're working a tough job for minimum wage... how about giving 'em a break. They really can do without a lecture when they may have been on their feet for 6 hours and already act as apologists for the kitchen as it is.

As to the Queen and Prince Philip, can any of us compare our expectations to theirs... they are of another era and another environment. Besides, Princes William and Harry often use the phrase when talking with their charities or colleagues.

I bet there were phrases we used in our youth that set past generations on edge - time moves on.

 

[boffy]

i am so used to the word guys its kind of chummy...was watching the sloany version of towee and the guys are calling each other "bro" it was funny not irritating

 

[Brissles]

Hmm, they're working a tough job for minimum wage... how about giving 'em a break. They really can do without a lecture when they may have been on their feet for 6 hours and already act as apologists for the kitchen as it is.

As to the Queen and Prince Philip, can any of us compare our expectations to theirs... they are of another era and another environment. Besides, Princes William and Harry often use the phrase when talking with their charities or colleagues.

I bet there were phrases we used in our youth that set past generations on edge - time moves on.

We've all worked for little money at some time or other, whether its a paper round, or as I did working Saturdays in Woolworths for 18/- (90p) for the day - ok a lipstick was 1/11d (10p) and a pair of tights was similarly priced, but to some of us it was a rite of passage. Its a tough life, but we soon grow up, hopefully with respect and manners.

 

[May]

I remember my lads when younger went to a football training week during school.holidays (a life saver lol) and they came home saying .."ok guys ...ok guys .." Lol ..I think it made them laugh when the coach addressed the group like that lol..

 

[loveallthingsitalian]

Gee, I may not be on my feet all day but I do a blinking hard days work and come home to more, just like nearly everyone on this forum, and the day I call my clients, guys/babes/Hun I will offer to retire.

And no, we who object are not old biddies, just people who don't want standards to drop any more than they already have.

 

[Tiddlywinks]

We've all worked for little money at some time or other, whether its a paper round, or as I did working Saturdays in Woolworths for 18/- (90p) for the day - ok a lipstick was 1/11d (10p) and a pair of tights was similarly priced, but to some of us it was a rite of passage. Its a tough life, but we soon grow up, hopefully with respect and manners.

I bet you'd like to stick them all in the army - that'd teach them a bit of respect... or perhaps into 'service' for the older generation to train them in 'respect and manners' :mysmilie_59:?

If language and attitudes didn't evolve over time, we'd still all be covering chair legs to avoid causing offence and pregnant women would 'disappear' for a 'period of confinement' etc etc.

 

[loveallthingsitalian]

I suppose it just depends on what your personal standards are.

 

[Tiddlywinks]

I suppose it just depends on what your personal standards are.

I went to an all-girls faith school and we were taught - funny to remember now - deportment and etiquette as part of our education.

My personal standards (for myself) are high BUT I also have a high tolerance level for others that may not have the experiences I have had.

The most important thing to me is the intent behind the words - did they mean to cause offence or be disrespectful? Mostly not, so I let it go, no harm done.

 

[Craftalot]

I bet you'd like to stick them all in the army - that'd teach them a bit of respect... or perhaps into 'service' for the older generation to train them in 'respect and manners' :mysmilie_59:?

If language and attitudes didn't evolve over time, we'd still all be covering chair legs to avoid causing offence and pregnant women would 'disappear' for a 'period of confinement' etc etc.

I think Brissles was rightly pointing out that the fact that the poor pay of waitresses and the like has no relevance to their lack of respect or manners. I think trying to argue that standards of behaviour haven't diminished in Britain in the past twenty years is patently ridiculous.

I'd offer an observation. A couple of years ago, we were hosting some French friends of ours who hadn't been to Britain for a very long time. It was a Saturday evening and we went for a lovely meal in Cambridge. Afterwards, we decided to walk though the centre of town. We witnessed, amongst other things, fights between grown men, young girls of twenty or so vomiting in the street (one was slumped over the wall of King's College and, most memorably, a girl going to the lavatory in the gutter in Trinity Passage (not the most private of places). This would have been bad enough, but the thing that's stuck with me was the look on our friends' faces. Not disgust or shock or contempt. Just bafflement. They just couldn't understand what would motivate these young people to do this kind of thing; how they could have such little respect for themselves and their communities.

It's too easy to dismiss this sort of thing as old biddies going a bit Daily Mail or UKIP. But those of us who remember when bad manners were the exception rather than the norm find this sort of over-familiarity and lack of basic respect irksome. By the way, there'd be no point of 'sticking them in the army'. The army wouldn't have them.

 

[Vienna]

Lack of discipline all around is to blame and no I don`t mean bringing back the cane or wives being locked in the house all day or kids being told to be seen and not heard etc etc etc. I mean discipline at home, at work, at play, how we speak and most importantly self discipline. How many employees spend time on facebook or twitter or their mobile phone during working hours and how many employers allow them to do so ? How many parents allow their kids to eat standing up or in front of the TV or on the move or in their bedrooms so they don`t learn table manners or how to converse in a social setting ? How many people don`t say please, thank you, excuse me etc and it`s simply accepted ? How many teenagers/adults ignore people or talk without actually looking at you because they`re texting on their phone ? How many people go for a night out just to see how many jaiger (sp) bombs they can down and don`t have the discipline to know when enough is enough ? How many parents do you hear screaming and swearing at their kids instead of talking to them and how many kids do you hear screaming and swearing back ? The list just goes on and on, normal or rather once normal discipline, is missing everywhere and with the discipline disappeared a lot of good manners and good standards. It`s become a free for all, behave as you please, speak as you please, work as you please and disrespect as you please. Call me an old fuddy duddy if you like.

 

[Ellaaa]

It's easy to look upon the 'good old days' as times when people were better people. I was born in the 80s and look at the 70s with horror and disgust at the acceptance (from some) of child abuse and sexism. Everything isn't great now, just as everything wasn't great then. Ok manners might not be as good now as they used to be, but there are a lot of things that are a damn sight better.

I will happily take a world where women, different sexualities and different races are all judged as equals, rather than a world 40 or 50 years ago where there may have been a few more P's and Q's but there was a terrible attitude to those groups of people.