Random musings and general banter.

[Duke of Cheese]

Mark clearly displayed signs of anxiety to me. I’ve suffered from it, and people who’ve suffered from it can generally see it in others. I can clearly remember my head shaking when I had to give evidence in court as a young police officer. I was thinking everybody in the courtroom could see me in that state, which probably some of them could.

Chef Mark has appeared to me to be a bag of nerves at times, and I think a number of his mistakes culinary wise have been down to him not thinking straight, and then blind panicking, rather than any straightforward incompetence. That said, he has tried to big himself up when talking about his background in cooking, and then making a ridiculous mistake by saying that Michelin graded restaurants up to four stars, which then killed the credibility of what he said immediately before, straight away.

Being in the Police left me a complete bag of nerves, and I hated the job, which I forced myself to do for nearly seven years. If getting older brings you good things in life, it’s continued oxygen, and not forcing yourself to do things you don’t want to do any longer and make you ill. A great relief.

 

[Muttley]

Seems you realise I’m the type who would get despondent.

I’m down the doctors on Tuesday, so want some positive vibes for her

Fingers crossed things improve for you x

 

[Jazzydrury]

Fingers crossed things improve for you x

Thanks Muttley need some flith

 

[Niwa]

I know we’ve taken the mick out of Mark, but seriously if he has issues, being on TV isnt fair on him

I don't recall seeing the flaming one on IW doing any presentations for quite a while now.
Wonder if they've dropped him or he's dropped them?
The food produced by either of them is not a patch on QVC.

 

[Duke of Cheese]

I suspect he’s had his chips…

 

[Samki]

I suspect he’s had his chips…

I’m afraid he did

 

[Niwa]

I see the Moronics back on.
Obviously didn't take my comments on board about his shonky looking beard.
He thinks he's the bees knees.
Actually looks like he's had a manky tortoiseshell cat strapped to his face.
Mind you if he starts doing his crappy cat impersonations he could complete the experience.

 

[Professor Branestawm]

Thanks to everyone who was so kind yesterday. Still Didn’t sleep.

Has anybody took sleeping pills, are they really that addictive, that is why I’d rather not

Hi Jazzy,
Some swear by the natural product Valerian.
It’s in ‘nightol’ which you can get over the counter at Boots etc.
It’s a good thing to try, I think, before the more potent or addictive stuff. Just tell your doc. before you start, but it worked for my son when he was having some sleep problems.
I also agree with the lavender pillow spray and the relaxation music and voices that Alex recommended- all good stuff, but what matters is to find what works for you.

 

[Muttley]

Thanks Muttley need some flith

Shame you're not with me this evening Jazzy, I'm at the Royal Festival Hall to see Fascinating Aida, a female cabaret group who sing comic songs, a couple of them are FILTH! One of the songs is called Dogging, obviously I don't know what that's about cos I'm angelic

However another song is called "is it me or is it hot in here", I do know what that's about!

 

[HughTwo]

Of-the-Masons = "I'm not allowed to mention any major Swiss watch brands but think of two of them"

Trevor has a hell of a collection of these IW watches - and his wife adds to them
He has just texted in and Mason wants to buy him a pint.
Of-the-Masons has had a Jacque de Manure watch for ten years and blokes always want a look.

"These are flying out" - yes, Mike, so they are, and you're modelling nicely trimmed facial hair!

Why don't they use one of the rechargeable razors they flog and shave off the whiskers on his chin.
I'm sure you can see bits of his Christmas dinner.

Most of us are agreed it's like a rancid bird's nest*

*not a direct comparison.

 

[galesgal57]

Shame you're not with me this evening Jazzy, I'm at the Royal Festival Hall to see Fascinating Aida, a female cabaret group who sing comic songs, a couple of them are FILTH! One of the songs is called Dogging, obviously I don't know what that's about cos I'm angelic

However another song is called "is it me or is it hot in here", I do know what that's about!

I'm impressed Muttley. They are hilarious, I thought they would be too near the knuckle for a delicate flower like you. Enjoy.

 

[Jazzydrury]

just turned over and it’s Emu Balm

 

[HughTwo]

We have the cure for insomnia.
Of-the-Masons read out a testimonial for the great Emu Balm saying they went from three to four hours sleep to getting seven.
And, of course, he can relate to that

 

[Muttley]

I'm impressed Muttley. They are hilarious, I thought they would be too near the knuckle for a delicate flower like you. Enjoy.

Interval now, one song got a good reaction, the pianist singing a song about cooking birds, then the line "they think I'm a knob, I just lost my job, it's a tough life being Greg Wallace"

Third time seeing them, hilarious as always.

We've heard Cheap Flights, and one about sending your mother to Dignitas

 

[galesgal57]

Interval now, one song got a good reaction, the pianist singing a song about cooking birds, then the line "they think I'm a knob, I just lost my job, it's a tough life being Greg Wallace"

Third time seeing them, hilarious as always.

We've heard Cheap Flights, and one about sending your mother to Dignitas

Have they sung I'm a c*nt yet?

 

[Xennial]

Mark clearly displayed signs of anxiety to me. I’ve suffered from it, and people who’ve suffered from it can generally see it in others. I can clearly remember my head shaking when I had to give evidence in court as a young police officer. I was thinking everybody in the courtroom could see me in that state, which probably some of them could.

Chef Mark has appeared to me to be a bag of nerves at times, and I think a number of his mistakes culinary wise have been down to him not thinking straight, and then blind panicking, rather than any straightforward incompetence. That said, he has tried to big himself up when talking about his background in cooking, and then making a ridiculous mistake by saying that Michelin graded restaurants up to four stars, which then killed the credibility of what he said immediately before, straight away.

Being in the Police left me a complete bag of nerves, and I hated the job, which I forced myself to do for nearly seven years. If getting older brings you good things in life, it’s continued oxygen, and not forcing yourself to do things you don’t want to do any longer and make you ill. A great relief.

My late mother had hypertension, along with various other health issues. The body shaking and shaking of her hands was caused by it. He may not have that, but seeing his hands shake reminds me of watching my mum struggle to cook.

 

[HughTwo]

If you want sleaze, watch Of-the-Masons.

Flogging a slimming belt with Trout Pout, shes says, "put it on and go for a walk".
"A walk on the wild side," leers Mason. "Nobody will ever know," she replies.

He probably thinks he should be replacing Greg Wallace on Masterchef.

He certainly has the same bald head and works with some awful cooks*

*not a direct comparison.

 

[HughTwo]

Luke Littler because World Darts Champion at 17.

Quick, bring out those magnetic dartboards for Torchy to flog.

And only a matter of time before Pedro claims Emu Balm lubricates darts player's elbows.

 

[Muttley]

Have they sung I'm a c*nt yet?

They ended the show with "Try not to be a c*nt it's Christmas"

Their walk off music is Status Quo's Rocking All Over World. Two of them are in their 70s!

 

[galesgal57]

They ended the show with "Try not to be a c*nt it's Christmas"

Their walk off music is Status Quo's Rocking All Over World. Two of them are in their 70s!

That's the song, I knew it had the taboo word in it.