OK I will start off by writing a few words about my beloved Millie, my shih tzu who passed away in August 2011 having had sudden heart problems...
I went to look at my parents puppy they'd chosen and the woman who had him said I could buy "Ebony" from her as she was a year old & too small for breeding.
I saw this disheveled little black dog, incredibly thin, wierd yellowish skin with a face that looked like a cross between an old chinese man & a monkey. I decided to get my house & dog walking arrangements sorted out as I was working & commuting at the time & went back to buy her the following weekend. When we crossed over the QE2 Bridge to take her home for the 1st time we never looked back! She refused to answer to Ebony, so after some debate the local children liked "Mad Millie" so Millie was her name.
It turned out that she was under weight, under nourished and had lumps on her back where I found out she'd been beaten with a stick. It took some doing getting her into good health & special food from the vets but when she bounced back boy did she!! Her cat chasing skills were phenominal lol! She never ever attacked or even snarled at them she just loved the chase even in the final weeks of her life. The cats used to parade across my decking so I think they liked the game too
. She turned into a beautiful handsome girl. The vet even said I should put her in the small dog agility at Crufts she was that fast & he was serious! She would never be obedient enough to be crufts material, she was like Catherine Tate's old nan at times, loveable & mischievous.
She was the naughtiest, funniest dog I've ever met! Nicking stuff & hiding in in her blankee, weeing on the carpet and then barking with excitement, tunnelling herself into next door's garden as she liked to poo on their shingle oh yes she was a little monkey but always in a comical, loving way.
I've grieved for all my past pets & love them all but I knew that from the get go she'd be the one who would truly break my heart when she left this earth. (I think it was because I'd never had a dog that defiant lol).
The night she passed I was lying in bed, staying awake to watch over her. I honestly didn't think it was her time as she'd had worse nights and then been chasing cats in the morning. Next thing I remember I was dreaming & saw my mum, (who is very much alive & well). She told me to go to Millie she didn't have long. I replied that that wasnt true, the vets said she could live for another couple of years on her meds. The answer came back "NO, now is Millie's time, you've done all you can but you must be with her now"! I woke up, thought I'd had a dreadful nitemare & cradled Millie as I took her downstairs. She passed away looking at me intently & lovingly at home an hour later whilst I had my hand on her body on the phone to the night vet.
I can't tell you the utter devastation I felt! I also pondered about the dream I'd had & thought there must be an after life so now she's my guardian angel. I'm sure I saw her staring at me with intense love through my bedroom window just over 2 weeks after she passed. I've also had readings where reputable mediums have given me her name, colour, appearance and key words I used to tell her.
I always told her when she was alive we'd meet again but not until I've had a full life first. It's sad but I also feel full of belief that we all go on & meet again xx.