is JF really 45? a joke surely

[merryone]

I'll happily swap "cadaverous" for very thin if it makes you feel better, Merry. You are correct, I wasn't trying to be nasty, just trying to explain why she might, in my eyes, look older than her years.It has been pointed out before on other threads that extreme thinness often does no favours once one is past a certain age. Happily, I doubt I will ever be really thin.I think she may also be a naturally skinny person. One of my daughters is really thin, always has been, and she now,at the age of 41 looks a good bit older than the other three.
As I said in my post, I didn't like the O.P.'s remarks but decided to add my objective view of Ms. Franks

That's the thing, it's not about making ME feel better. I feel a bit mean picking out your comment, but it was I felt a good illustration of what I was trying to put across..just that should the person in question see that, it could be very hurtful. I do agree with what say on this otherwise x

 

[Akimbo]

Personal comments?

Was just about to say, as Merryweather mentioned, that name-calling someone a "Bully" isn't playing nice either.

I'd be mortified if someone on here called me a bully on a thread, no one here knows me well enough to pass judgement.


Funny that on another thread, saying Julia is looking ill is acceptable and illicits concern that she's poorly or losing weight too quickly, but this thread launches a tirade against the OP. I took the original post as phrased for comic effect, short and snappy but not particularly insulting. Same with the cadaver comment..comic emphasis nothing more.

I reckon JF isn't the healthiest looking specimen of 40something womanhood either.

Lighten up it's just a forum about shopping telly! No one considers the vendors feelings when we're lambasting their rubbish products.

Jude xx

 

[galaxy]

Hi, I'm not saying that "bullying" does not occur on forums, but I would like to say the moderators here do an excellent job, and I know that Graham won't tolerated bullying in any way shape or form. Many a thread is closed if the mods feel that it is descending into unconstructive argument or downright nastiness and well done to them.

On the subject of presenters, that is a tricky one, yes, they're in the public eye, so they're open to cristisism as much as they are praise. As I said before, I don't think it's right to slate someone because of the looks they were born with, but I don't think it's quite fair to call those thread starters, or those who have made such comments "bullies". Personally, I find such threads and comments thoughtless, they're not wanting to upset anyone one here, but forget that this forum could possibly be seen by that person and deeply hurt their feelings. I know I said that this kind of thread is inviting further derogatory comments, but I think in most cases on this particular forum, the poster hasn't really considered the bigger picture.

I have also noticed that some posters use words that aren't immediately obvious, for the sake of argument "cadeverous", I apologise to the poster who used this as I know 100% you weren't trying to be nasty, but I looked it up and it meant corpse like....mmmm. I think if someone had said that about me I'd be absolutely mortified. "Thin, even very thin wouldn't have been quite so bad". Think it just goes to show that we ALL need to be more thoughtful around here, and that also means thinking twice about labelling people "bullies".
If anyone has any concerns, as I said before, we've got a great team of mods who are here to help us!

One can sugar-coat a bully all they want, but vile comments of a personal nature are not passed down as a friendly banter, they DO intend hurt. None of us are children, not to realise that. As for not being fair to call someone a bully who chooses to behave in this manner - sorry but it's more than fair! Let them have a taste of their own medicine, or is it too bitter of a pill to swallow??!

 

[galaxy]

Exactly!! And we certainly don't need self appointed forum police who in effect have only been members for 5 minutes.

On the subject of 'policing': No one is stopping anybody else on this forum from commenting on what they want to comment, but HOW they choose to say it IS an issue (although I personally would never choose to comment on other's personal appearance).

As for your argument of '5 minutes', sorry to say but you (or anyone else for that matter) being on here for much longer than me, doesn’t automatically give you any more rights than me.

 

[galaxy]

Was just about to say, as Merryweather mentioned, that name-calling someone a "Bully" isn't playing nice either.

I'd be mortified if someone on here called me a bully on a thread, no one here knows me well enough to pass judgement.


Funny that on another thread, saying Julia is looking ill is acceptable and illicits concern that she's poorly or losing weight too quickly, but this thread launches a tirade against the OP. I took the original post as phrased for comic effect, short and snappy but not particularly insulting. Same with the cadaver comment..comic emphasis nothing more.

I reckon JF isn't the healthiest looking specimen of 40something womanhood either.

Lighten up it's just a forum about shopping telly! No one considers the vendors feelings when we're lambasting their rubbish products.

Jude xx

As I said I don't intend to apologise to anyone for using a rightful term to describe someone's unacceptable behaviour that they've chosen to use and present themselves in such vile manner. Yeah, they might not like the term that describes them in their true light, but truth sometimes hurts. I am sure they can deal with it, as if they were prepared to dish it out, they should be prepared to have it served to themselves, too! No sympathy if some of them felt hurt by my chosen term.

As a matter of fact it's about time they get labelled correctly so they can become accountable for their nastiness. I've noticed majority of people pussyfoot around unacceptable behaviour like that, for the fear of being themselves pick on with unpleasant and nasty comments.

Do I think any of my contributions on here will stop the bullies and make them think and analyse their shameful behaviour? - No, frankly, I don't.
But am I prepared to let them get away with it - MOST DEFENATELY NOT.

 

[Pinkpussycat]

As for your argument of '5 minutes', sorry to say but you (or anyone else for that matter) being on here for much longer than me, doesn’t automatically give you any more rights than me.

Where did I say it did??

 

[Daisy2911]

I think Galaxy, that you're over reacting a bit don't you think? This thread was started by someone who, in their eyes, thought JF looked older than her 45 years.. A lot of people on here probably think the same.. But just because you didn't like what the poster said, you say its bullying.. People will be frightened to say boo to a goose soon, for fear of being called a bully or worse! :thinking:

 

[Pinkpussycat]

As I said I don't intend to apologise to anyone for using a rightful term to describe someone's unacceptable behaviour that they've chosen to use and present themselves in such vile manner. Yeah, they might not like the term that describes them in their true light, but truth sometimes hurts. I am sure they can deal with it, as if they were prepared to dish it out, they should be prepared to have it served to themselves, too! No sympathy if some of them felt hurt by my chosen term.

As a matter of fact it's about time they get labelled correctly so they can become accountable for their nastiness. I've noticed majority of people pussyfoot around unacceptable behaviour like that, for the fear of being themselves pick on with unpleasant and nasty comments.

Do I think any of my contributions on here will stop the bullies and make them think and analyse their shameful behaviour? - No, frankly, I don't.
But am I prepared to let them get away with it - MOST DEFENATELY NOT.

Lol Such worthiness, very evangelical....:mysmilie_483:

 

[galaxy]

Lol Such worthiness, very evangelical....:mysmilie_483:

Exactly how one would expect a bully in disguise to react...:hi:

 

[galaxy]

I think Galaxy, that you're over reacting a bit don't you think? This thread was started by someone who, in their eyes, thought JF looked older than her 45 years.. A lot of people on here probably think the same.. But just because you didn't like what the poster said, you say its bullying.. People will be frightened to say boo to a goose soon, for fear of being called a bully or worse! :thinking:

Daisy2911, with all due respect: this or any other thread that carries nasty and vile content like this: “I read someone joking that JF is 45, ha ha ha. My you made me laugh with that one. Never in this world is she 45, even with all the Gatinau in the world, (actually it doesn't work anyway). I'd have said 52. Whatever, she's still a pain “, should be flagged as being plain and simple - bully behaviour at their most low! I said this before so I won’t elaborate too much: it’s not what people choose to comment on, but HOW they choose to comment.

 

[Akimbo]

Who the Hell apointed you arbiter of bullying behaviour? Your very approach is disturbing...There! I went there! No I'm not a bully, I speak as I find. You are the one on the attack!

Jude xx

 

[vampyre]

The owner of this site and the mods do an excellent job of "policing" this forum and unless it is reporting offensive posts to the administrators by clicking the red button on the top right of every post, I don't think they need any help. This board rocks because of how it is run unlike others that are out there :rock:

 

[Artemis]

Lol Such worthiness, very evangelical....:mysmilie_483:

....and misspelt, too.........I believe the word is 'definitely'

 

[galaxy]

Who the Hell apointed you arbiter of bullying behaviour? Your very approach is disturbing...There! I went there! No I'm not a bully, I speak as I find. You are the one on the attack!

Jude xx

Nobody named you in particular as the bully Jude, far from it, I was only replying to your comments (something to the effect of: how would I dare to call the bullies - bullies).

Judging by some of the tetchy replies that keep coming, it seems my comments might have stirred rather a large hornets’ nest...that is the truly disturbing picture here!

I couldn't have been more precise in what I was saying: some original comments on this (and some other threads) are far from acceptable and I for one am not prepared to turn a blind eye to them. If you haven't indulged in such behaviour in the past or planning to do so in future, you have no reason to feel offended by what I say. My reply to you was purely based on your last comment and nowhere did I point the finger at you personally, but through it I conveyed my message to the relevant people and I was elaborating my stand on the subject.

I am not going to be apologising to anybody if they feel offended, as I haven’t said ANYTHING that can be remotely offending unless someone recognises some of their past/present behaviour as the one discussed in this post. I've said it before, the truth hurts... Tough for those and no sympathy offered, get over it and deal with your shameful actions!
My comments were and still are very general and directed to all concerned who are indulging in vile and nasty comments about someone’s personal appearance (note that this is very different from constructive criticism).The exception admittedly being my comment to pinkpussycat which was directed specifically to her (but she simply was asking for it though and it serves her right).

 

[NIKKID]

I have actually forgotten what a "real" woman of 45 should like like. I think we are all accustomed to botoxed and filled perfect media constructions. Take Kylie as an example - she is 42, just a few years younger than JF but looks a good decade younger in my opinion.

 

[LipstickCherry]

Nobody named you in particular as the bully Jude, far from it, I was only replying to your comments (something to the effect of: how would I dare to call the bullies - bullies).

Judging by some of the tetchy replies that keep coming, it seems my comments might have stirred rather a large hornets’ nest...that is the truly disturbing picture here!

I couldn't have been more precise in what I was saying: some original comments on this (and some other threads) are far from acceptable and I for one am not prepared to turn a blind eye to them. If you haven't indulged in such behaviour in the past or planning to do so in future, you have no reason to feel offended by what I say. My reply to you was purely based on your last comment and nowhere did I point the finger at you personally, but through it I conveyed my message to the relevant people and I was elaborating my stand on the subject.

I am not going to be apologising to anybody if they feel offended, as I haven’t said ANYTHING that can be remotely offending unless someone recognises some of their past/present behaviour as the one discussed in this post. I've said it before, the truth hurts... Tough for those and no sympathy offered, get over it and deal with your shameful actions!
My comments were and still are very general and directed to all concerned who are indulging in vile and nasty comments about someone’s personal appearance (note that this is very different from constructive criticism).The exception admittedly being my comment to pinkpussycat which was directed specifically to her (but she simply was asking for it though and it serves her right).

I think you should have clarified the bit that I have highlighted in red, galaxy - that some of the comments are far from acceptable TO YOU. It is your opinion only, and not fact. It annoys the hell out of me when someone states what is only their opinion as fact.

 

[galaxy]

....and misspelt, too.........I believe the word is 'definitely'

OK I will most definitely award you a point there, you've scored!

Nit picking comes to mind, Artemis... or have the real arguments run out??

Not to worry, I've said everything I wanted to say on this subject for now and I'll leave the 'gang' to wrap it up and vent its fury on me. :mysmilie_462:How dare someone disturb their Status Quo (God forbid for such a thought!).

For anyone else, I can hear them quietly congratulate me. :blush:

 

[Sazza]

As I said I don't intend to apologise to anyone for using a rightful term to describe someone's unacceptable behaviour that they've chosen to use and present themselves in such vile manner. Yeah, they might not like the term that describes them in their true light, but truth sometimes hurts. I am sure they can deal with it, as if they were prepared to dish it out, they should be prepared to have it served to themselves, too! No sympathy if some of them felt hurt by my chosen term.

As a matter of fact it's about time they get labelled correctly so they can become accountable for their nastiness. I've noticed majority of people pussyfoot around unacceptable behaviour like that, for the fear of being themselves pick on with unpleasant and nasty comments.

Do I think any of my contributions on here will stop the bullies and make them think and analyse their shameful behaviour? - No, frankly, I don't.
But am I prepared to let them get away with it - MOST DEFENATELY NOT.

Nobody named you in particular as the bully Jude, far from it, I was only replying to your comments (something to the effect of: how would I dare to call the bullies - bullies).

Judging by some of the tetchy replies that keep coming, it seems my comments might have stirred rather a large hornets’ nest...that is the truly disturbing picture here!

I couldn't have been more precise in what I was saying: some original comments on this (and some other threads) are far from acceptable and I for one am not prepared to turn a blind eye to them. If you haven't indulged in such behaviour in the past or planning to do so in future, you have no reason to feel offended by what I say. My reply to you was purely based on your last comment and nowhere did I point the finger at you personally, but through it I conveyed my message to the relevant people and I was elaborating my stand on the subject.

I am not going to be apologising to anybody if they feel offended, as I haven’t said ANYTHING that can be remotely offending unless someone recognises some of their past/present behaviour as the one discussed in this post. I've said it before, the truth hurts... Tough for those and no sympathy offered, get over it and deal with your shameful actions!
My comments were and still are very general and directed to all concerned who are indulging in vile and nasty comments about someone’s personal appearance (note that this is very different from constructive criticism).The exception admittedly being my comment to pinkpussycat which was directed specifically to her (but she simply was asking for it though and it serves her right).

We have a "report a post" function on this forum and I suggest in future you use it if you think someone is being a bully. As far as I can see there is no one in this thread being a bully and I would suggest you refrain from personal attacks on other forum members.

 

[Artemis]

I don't have any arguments, Galaxy. I gave an objective opinion, without malice, and registered my objection to some of the OP's comments, as I have done on many occasions when I think people are OTT.

I don't see it as my job to dwell at length upon their means of expression as they are entitled to their POV.
I agree that the spelling was a cheap point, but you did mention that you are a schoolteacher.....

 

[Akimbo]

judge not....

You missed my point...not that I thought you were calling me a bully but that I'd be upset if anyone did. Ergo calling someone a bully based on a couple of lines of prose is name-calling and unsupportable.


Jude