Have I just tuned into Jackanory?

[fulhamphil]

Peter Simon appears to be delivering some great long-winded story about a Coalport figurine - sat on a plinth under a spot-light like some rare artifact . God knows what he's blathering on about - I gave up after about five minutes. Rather than coming out with a load of old toffee, would it really be too much to ask to just describe the item and give the relevant details? :wave:

 

[Enigma]

Peter Simon appears to be delivering some great long-winded story about a Coalport figurine - sat on a plinth under a spot-light like some rare artifact . God knows what he's blathering on about - I gave up after about five minutes. Rather than coming out with a load of old toffee, would it really be too much to ask to just describe the item and give the relevant details? :wave:

You're expecting FAR too little of St Peter of Simon!

ANYONE could stand there and accurately describe what they're selling, but for Bullsh*t Pete it takes seconds of thought (and copious amounts of Night Nurse) to come up with this standard of waffle :wonder:

 

[deedee]

don't even start me on this one!
it's dire, and how long can he go on for??!!
really the man needs to be retired
he is seriously awful IMO

 

[earwig]

not only the purples not only the golds it flows and skips, not only in the manchester evening NEWSES , she was
the lady who was invited to that ball, for that wonderful night in august..... the world had changed and the celebrations
that you see in her face and the wonderful taffetas the organisation of silks and RIBBENS had created such an inspiration
she bacame the debutant, she became the woman of the 21st century, this was the changing tide of 1947, with midwives
and shawl and new beginnings from the east end to the west end to barrow to cardiff to belfast the world had seen nothing
like the events of 1939 to 1945. this young woman was to take her place to find love, to find children and to dance.... blah
blah blah from aeroplanes to telecommunications to the fascination of the cinema to the wonder of the telephone the radio
wireless networks this is olivia in the purples and the beautiful finish of golds.... jesus christ peter SHUT UPPPPPPPPPPP!!!!!!

 

[Wirral70]

I didn't catch the Coalport sales but I watched him selling the handbags (he didn't do too well with the 'Berkeley' masterpiece, I thought they were cheap ciggies?)

It's hard to sum up Peter's performance. Bizarre is a word that springs to mind but I think it's best summed up as extraordinary.

Hugging them, almost (almost) in tears. Quite extraordinary.

 

[merryone]

don't even start me on this one!
it's dire, and how long can he go on for??!!
really the man needs to be retired
he is seriously awful IMO

I couldn't agree more Deedee

He doesn't do his job properly. He's a television presenter selling goods to the public, so one would think that the requirements would include having to speak clearly and coherently -He does neither.

His sales pitch is riddled with sexual innuendo, which wouldn't be so bad were it occassional and a little bit saucy...oooh missus!, but no, we're treated to veiled descriptions of such things as "Dogging" and "Cottaging" (and they were the less rude ones tbh!)

When he comes into contact with food, one might be forgiven for thinking that they've tuned into to some kind of dodgy fetish channel, as he licks, slurps and dribbles in the most disgusting manner!

....and whilst I don't know this for sure, but I've heard he's a right diva, and actually quite an unpleasant man off screen (forgive me if I'm wrong), but I'm sure I've heard this

In all like Deedee says...he's gotta go!

 

[Wirral70]

I couldn't agree more Deedee

He doesn't do his job properly. He's a television presenter selling goods to the public, so one would think that the requirements would include having to speak clearly and coherently -He does neither.

His sales pitch is riddled with sexual innuendo, which wouldn't be so bad were it occassional and a little bit saucy...oooh missus!, but no, we're treated to veiled descriptions of such things as "Dogging" and "Cottaging" (and they were the less rude ones tbh!)

When he comes into contact with food, one might be forgiven for thinking that they've tuned into to some kind of dodgy fetish channel, as he licks, slurps and dribbles in the most disgusting manner!

....and whilst I don't know this for sure, but I've heard he's a right diva, and actually quite an unpleasant man off screen (forgive me if I'm wrong), but I'm sure I've heard this

In all like Deedee says...he's gotta go!

I bet even the people who have worked with him for years don't 'know' him. He strikes me as one of those people who spins a web around himself. He certainly does with us, one minute he lives alone, the next he dosen't. You could never tell anything about him from his multiple layers of bullshit and that's after 13 years on the channel. But I do know 'he'd never do us wrong'.

I genuinely do not like him. I find him really creepy, almost dark. He seems a very complicated 'character'.

 

[Mommabear]

not only the purples not only the golds it flows and skips, not only in the manchester evening NEWSES , she was
the lady who was invited to that ball, for that wonderful night in august..... the world had changed and the celebrations
that you see in her face and the wonderful taffetas the organisation of silks and RIBBENS had created such an inspiration
she bacame the debutant, she became the woman of the 21st century, this was the changing tide of 1947, with midwives
and shawl and new beginnings from the east end to the west end to barrow to cardiff to belfast the world had seen nothing
like the events of 1939 to 1945. this young woman was to take her place to find love, to find children and to dance.... blah
blah blah from aeroplanes to telecommunications to the fascination of the cinema to the wonder of the telephone the radio
wireless networks this is olivia in the purples and the beautiful finish of golds.... jesus christ peter SHUT UPPPPPPPPPPP!!!!!!

Did he read that off a laminate?

Jesus!!!!

Let's all get an egg out the microwave to throw at him :bear:

 

[tony73]

Let's all get an egg out the microwave to throw at him :bear:

Stop using the microwave to do eggs. Buy one of those plastic dome egg boilers off Bid!

 

[merryone]

Did he read that off a laminate?

Jesus!!!!

Let's all get an egg out the microwave to throw at him :bear:

Hey, let's not! - I've told you what he's like with food! I suspect he'd ram it somewhere whole, and start dribbling from both ends..No thank you!

 

[deedee]

Hey, let's not! - I've told you what he's like with food! I suspect he'd ram it somewhere whole, and start dribbling from both ends..No thank you!

eeeew merryone, did you have to?!
I'm quite put off my sunday lunch
that's such a revolting image!! uke::thinking:

 

[deedee]

I bet even the people who have worked with him for years don't 'know' him. He strikes me as one of those people who spins a web around himself. He certainly does with us, one minute he lives alone, the next he dosen't. You could never tell anything about him from his multiple layers of bullshit and that's after 13 years on the channel. But I do know 'he'd never do us wrong'.

I genuinely do not like him. I find him really creepy, almost dark. He seems a very complicated 'character'.

Wirral I feel exactly the same way about him
I don't think what you see is what you get with him
I always have felt that there's a darker almost sleazy, sinister side to him which makes me extremely uncomfortable
And I don't buy the bumbling Uncle Peter routine, I'm convinced he's very aware of what he's doing

I also agree that a sales person should be clear and coherent but I get the feeling he's deliberately vague
We do have a go at the likes of Russell and Mason but at least they're clear, coherent and don't go off on irrelevant monologues (well, maybe James does a bit!!)

 

[Wirral70]

Wirral I feel exactly the same way about him
I don't think what you see is what you get with him
I always have felt that there's a darker almost sleazy, sinister side to him which makes me extremely uncomfortable
And I don't buy the bumbling Uncle Peter routine, I'm convinced he's very aware of what he's doing

I also agree that a sales person should be clear and coherent but I get the feeling he's deliberately vague
We do have a go at the likes of Russell and Mason but at least they're clear, coherent and don't go off on irrelevant monologues (well, maybe James does a bit!!)

Absolutely deedee. You only have to go back as recently as xmas. Him selling those shockingly overpriced gold plated, Tanzanite rings and talking ten to the dozen but curiously stopping dead when he got to the word 'gold'. I suspect bumbling Peter is as sharp as a blade and equally ruthless. And equally weird too, those handbag sales last night were like something I have never seen before.

He gives me the shivers even talking about him, honestly. No wonder he was retired from mainstream TV, vile.

 

[deedee]

Brace yourselves people.........there's a Thomas Kincaid special with Peter Simon tonight! oooh yeah!! :rock:

 

[Enigma]

Brace yourselves people.........there's a Thomas Kincaid special with Peter Simon tonight! oooh yeah!! :rock:

He was flogging a couple last night and kept going on about TK's love for family etc.

St Pete still didn't mention TK running off with another woman before he died though.

And just what are these "links" Bid have to the Kincaid family? I always assumed they got their stock from TK shops that went bust.

I don't see the appeal of this "art"

 

[Mommabear]

Brace yourselves people.........there's a Thomas Kincaid special with Peter Simon tonight! oooh yeah!! :rock:

I feel an early night coming on :clock:

 

[fulhamphil]

Brace yourselves people.........there's a Thomas Kincaid special with Peter Simon tonight! oooh yeah!! :rock:

Cue quasi-religious clap-trap with Peter welling up with emotion. Deeply distasteful.

 

[deedee]

Cue quasi-religious clap-trap with Peter welling up with emotion. Deeply distasteful.

exactly!
hardly appropriate when the guy was a fraudster and cheat with 'issues' that led to him committing suicide
there's no way you can romanticise any of that..............oh, of course Peter Simon can! uke: :headbang:

 

[Wirral70]

I have heard Peter Simon claim in the past that Kinkade died of natural causes or a heart attack.

No mention of Ethanol or Diazepam, what a delightful sounding cocktail.

I think i'll stick to Horlicks.

 

[Greg]

Don't overdose on it tho, Wirral70.

Shoppingtelly forum would be quite lost without you!