100 Things I Have learned from QVC..

[Loveinamist]

she could barely hide her disdain could she?
and then in the following gale hayman hour she started going on about bobbi brown. the hayman guest (cant recall her name, chubby, pretty) didnt look that impressed.

The 6 year user of Elemis ex Miss England model yesterday said the PCMC was an expensive hobby, AY had to quickly do damage limitation and the model said she buys it from QVC now and not her friend. The girl is a quick learner, just as well if she wants a return gig.

 

[Shop Til I Drop]

Buying the “Elemis Skin Nourishing Milk Bath Anniversary Edition” would be an excellent wedding gift.

When going over to a friend’s house for dinner I should take a candle with me instead of wine.

When an item is on 3 easy-pay I should buy 3 of them, as it would only be like paying out for one if it wasn’t on easy-pay.

If I buy a piece of Clogau Gold, I’m not to open it in the house, I have to go outside and open the box there in order to fully appreciate the piece.

 

[Bensmum]

This incredibly hideous item that no sane person will ever buy is going very, very quickly indeed so I need you on Qcut, the website or that red active button. This is the last day on introductory price and the first time ever on easy pay so take advantage while you can. This offer ends at midnight so get it while you can or as long as stocks last. You've got that 30 day money back guarantee but remember you lose that extortionate P&P charge and have to spend God knows what to give it us back, for the privilege.

 

[~orchid~]

That my toes curl with embarrassment everytime grown women ring in wanting Jennifer Kirk to pretend to blow crap glitter at them. :-?
That no matter how bad the reviews on the QVC website picking up one star in a total of 700 reviews it will still be sold for at least three more years at QVC. Doesn't matter if the same complaint is repeated ad nauseum.

 

[littlemslittle]

That there are no such things as "considered purchases"..... they're just very expensive purchases....

 

[scary]

What I have learnt on fashion hours:
1. I need a boot, a pump, a pant or a trouser
2. A little white t shirt
3. To 'throw something on'
4. Glen Campbell is an a**e

 

[stratobuddy]

1. They no longer sell TANZANITE because the world's supply HAS now run out and what you bought previously is now worth 10 times what you paid for it.


2. When you check your credit card statement 2 months after buying something on easy-pay, you will have no memory whatsoever of what you bought 2 months ago and are still paying for.


3. Why buy cards when you can spend hours making your own, which will cost far more than buying them in the first place?

 

[HoodedClaw]

The one thing I have learned whilst watching QVC is that I do like a good laugh.

 

[madaunty]

1. That I need a small handbag to keep in my large handbag.

2. During fashion hours if there is only one size/colour left, then it will be in a colour that suits everyone's skin tone and that the sizing is very forgiving.

3. Having manky looking feet does not preclude you from modelling footwear.

4. That despite presumably having access to all the "celebrity" hairdressers flogging their presteeegus hair products, most of the presenters are still in desperate need of a restyle/condition.

 

[maggiemay]

Nurses need to buy more skincare products than the rest of us.

Some QVC products possess mystic powers as they can "literally fly out of the door".

People from Toronto speak a strange secret language.

You're not allowed to be a T caller unless you've just come out of hospital.

 

[Silver Fox]

Congrats to all for giving us sooooooo many laughs,& it is all TRUE!!!!!!

many many thanks!!!

 

[medusa]

That I am no longer a full grown woman but am infact a gurrrl or a ladeeee.

That a serum that makes my skin look super shiny isn't infact greasy its 'radiant'

That despite cleanse and polish being an all in one cleanser and exfoliator due to the muslin cloth I now need a seperate exfoliator

All cuddly soft toys should be placed in polythene bags and vaccuum sealed.

that pebbles are now a semi precious stone as long as they come from only one place in the world and are called mookite.

 

[Frazzled]

1) It's acceptable for profit to deal with Basso (nothing will deter me from only using his surname)
2) It has been possible to get through life using the minimum ammount of expensive beauty products
3) It is possible not to buy products out of boredom
4) I really do have a sense of humour
5) The double whammy of metal weights down' prices up is not my imagination
6) The fragility of my local post office due to loss of business
7) When I press random numbers my remote control finds non-shopping channels
8) It's possible to go to bed before midnight
9) You're more popular with neighbours without wind chimes and illuminated reindeer
10) That 4 easy-pays add up to the full price

 

[CakeMate]

Ooohhh...I've learnt that:

My hair is NEVER an "exact match" with any hair extensions or wierd scrunchie things!

Clip-On fringes look sh!t on the models so no way are they going to look any better on me!

That I have a Décolletage!

I should "wear" a handbag and not carry it!

Clothes from Toronto DO cling!

Clothes from Toronto give you cellulite even when you don't have it!

Aliens ARE among us and they are living in Toronto!

If I go to a Red Carpet Event I can turn heads in my Toe Posts!

Pilates will NOT make my stomach flat!

Hopefully, if I grow my long, brunette hair even longer and flick it about abit it will disguise my non-flat stomach.

QVC models have all graduated from The QVC School of Looking Smug and Smurking...with honours!

My life wasn't worth living til I discovered LCD torches!

My kitchen can't cope with out freaky silicone cookware in the most vilest of colours known to mankind!

I can always make a skirt the right length by rolling over the waist band!

The nautical look is ALWAYS in vogue!

That the QVC fashion buying team and stylists are either blind or have the most amazing sense of humour EVER!!!!!!

That I can only wear an item of fashion to "the office" if I put a belt around it!

..............and STILL I keep buying!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! :mysmilie_506::mysmilie_506::mysmilie_506:

 

[London]

Value

"Paying £15.50 (+ £3.99) is such good value for two because I've seen them for £9.99 each"

Such a saving for something you didn't need in the first place and now you have two of them!!!!!!!:happy::happy::happy::happy::happy:

 

[Swansea girl]

Through Kipling bags I've discovered a whole new colour terninology:
* Chocolate brown means **** brown
* Organic green means green that could glow in the dark ( and give you a dose of radiation )
* Bedazzeled is a swirly pattern they couldnt shift in their shop outlets
* Mayan blue is in fact Turquoise
* Black usually means black but it can morph into Graphite should the occasion arise

Quack Quack!

 

[CakeMate]

Loving this thread!

Just read it for the 2nd time and I am still laughing!

:bow::bow::bow:

 

[barbedwire]

Alpha H Eye Serum will make your literal actual eye area peel off. Well, no it won't - I've been using it religiously twice a day for the last 6 weeks and it's not made one iota of difference to my literal actual delicate eye area. My dark circles are still there and haven't exfoliated themselves away...:cheeky:

 

[Mrs James]

Alpha H Eye Serum will make your literal actual eye area peel off. Well, no it won't - I've been using it religiously twice a day for the last 6 weeks and it's not made one iota of difference to my literal actual delicate eye area. My dark circles are still there and haven't exfoliated themselves away...:cheeky:

have you remembered to take your glasses off? :wonder:

 

[barbedwire]

have you remembered to take your glasses off? :wonder:

I'm ruddy glad you're around to keep me on the straight and narrow, Jamesy - THAT'S where I've been going wrong all this time :grin:

*takes glasses off, smears on alpha-h, watches eyeballs drop out...*