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You assume that this is a very well-paid gig for ALL of the presenters on the channel. Some of them, clearly, though, being paid a lot more than others. These are decently remunerated people living comfortable lives. Those lives clearly at odds with their selling strategies of pitching low rent...

I am really coming to the opinion now that it isn’t really a shopping channel at all, and it’s actually a long-term sketch that was meant for Victoria Wood on TV..

Because the place is run by children, I guess. Sometimes it seems that they only really run it as a comedy vehicle for this forum. Essentially, the gift that keeps giving. Not sure what you mean about the smiling bit? Are you talking about Torchy?

It is. Genuine picture except it said Unlock £5 Off originally…

My Mum used to dance around the room frantically to Cumberland Gap…

Yes, that old tactic. What was he saying last night? He had been all over the company making phone calls and calling in favours, apparently, to get some more of the stock. A cynic might assume they had this stock all along, but release staggered it at best? Of course, I might be wrong, and the...

Although he seems to be doing it less lately, this weird ‘I Never Lie to You’ strap-line he uses is a particularly weird thing to employ doing a job where by absolute design, you should be working within the tedious restrictions of the TRUTH. Can you imagine going into any High Street retailer...

Torchy trying to shift those ‘quality’ dartboards again. Didn’t help that one of the magnets fell out of the dart base as he threw it towards the board…

“Forget that I’m a shopping TV presenter - just buy this, please.” Is he for real? The guy is genuinely unbelievable. Morgan certainly doesn’t need to improve his skills in this area. I’ve also never seen him not involved in selling a product on the channel I wouldn’t be more than happy to put...

Looks cheap and nasty overall with flimsy looking filters and a wobbly and tacky feel in general. Still, that’s enough about Van Seezedklutch…As for that reappearing vacuum - I wouldn’t barge it with a touchpole - or any other Eastern European worker, Walter Mitty inappropriately comments on.

Apparently the dartboards were the only item not to sell out so far…

I feel a picture coming on…

Oh my God… That awful cheapest of the cheap dartboard. Unsold at a village hall jumble sale.

That ghastly vulgar woman. Talking about her son Ernie Jacks clambering all over her trying to lift her blouse up. I mean..... That's not a problem - but he is 24... Completely materialistically obsessed and sharing far too much information about her ostentatious, gaudy family life... You can...

Peter Simon has returned, hasn’t he?

Good to see the increasingly mysterious Caine back with more Yuletide Japanese Swords this morning..

Probably the most transparent of the bunch. That said - no difference in any of them when it comes to grossly exaggerating the quality of the watches that they try to sell. Some people get taken in by it and part with their money as a result.

Not seen Rob Lamarr in weeks?

Agreed. Car crash TV. Seven days a week.

You eventually run out of words for condemning their appallingly low standards of selling.