Random musings and general banter.

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I wonder why it makes commercial sense to employ two presenters (one as a so called ‘expert’ on bedding, and another to annoyingly gurn and simperingly Superize to the camera) to flog a ten quid throw? Does the grinning woman get lonely and needs company to flog blankets? Assuming both are on about £50 a show - why not save half of the hundred pounds and the price of five sales to pay for them and just have the one doing it? What is the actual problem with one individual selling one basic no frills, no difficult explanations sets of products. Bedding is not discount astrodyanamics, is it? Just wrap a blanket around yourself, make your gnashers initially chatter, then start to sweat profusely, chuck the blanket into the air in euphoric heated orgasmicness, then do a bit of mass panic spreading about being old and freezing to death, and hey ho, there you go - solo.

You wonder also why the reliance on this particular item of late? A £40 blanket and the aforementioned £10 throw thing are hardly high profile high profit items? What would the throw cost them cost? £3 or £4 maybe? Then they are doing free postage on the more expensive item to further reduce any profits. That surely doesn’t leave much of a margin overall. Which makes you go back to how they use their presenters and is it effective in terms of costs, and also why they seem to have so little variance in general now on the types of items they are trying to sell?
 
I don’t think I feel entirely comfortable with two middle aged men sitting by a king size divan in leisurewear (the men, not the bed) probing and poking soft toys on a dodgy stomach first thing on a Monday morning. Oh..thank god it was just a clip. Oh no…it’s old rubber head minus his cheap plastic hat, but dressed in his blue jerk o…in live in the studio with the Warehouse Non-Clearance extravaganza, selling tat from the back pages of the People’s Friend. Now he is creaming his strides over a £1.99 empty screen wash bottle. I’ll tell what, Rubber, I’ll go to Tesco, buy a bottle of screen wash and keep the bottle.
 
Classic IW cutting edge 80s sales tactics, Den is flogging yet another air fryer and apparently you cant get these ANYWHERE else......o_O

Den has 2 Air Fryers! Thats how good they are...BUT her two arent as good as this one they are flogging haha!! Den then asks "the gallery" and for the full sales pitch dramatism puts her hand to her ear and says....."how much have we sold?" ooooh Den is excited and Den also informs us EVERYONE who is buying is also adding the cook book"

Why does Den only put her hand to her earpiece when asking about sales and stock levels? :rolleyes:

As fake as a sales pitch gets!!! :sleep:
 
Oh Mr. Smarmy...Newish presenter name of Craig. If he were made of potatoes, he'd chip himself, air fry to follow and serve himself with an extremely sickly mayonnaise. Flirting with one of the more senior models like a dodgy lothario in an Austin Allegro. More oleaginous than Texaco.
 
The Duke of Cheese said:
Oh Mr. Smarmy...Newish presenter name of Craig. If he were made of potatoes, he'd chip himself, air fry to follow and serve himself with an extremely sickly mayonnaise. Flirting with one of the more senior models like a dodgy lothario in an Austin Allegro. More oleaginous than Texaco.
Click to expand...

But, but it was a very educational show, we learned from Jack that potatoes have more Vit C than oranges.

Of course in the real world they don't, gram for gram oranges has more Vit C, but it is close but only if you're eating the potatoes raw with skins on, as once you peel & cook them they lose a lot, and i mean a lot, of the Vit C. ;)

Of course Jack has never been the best on the educational front, he's often telling folks that Aluminium is the third best metal, after gold & copper, for conducting heat, obviously silver doesn't exist in Jack's world. ;) :ROFLMAO:
 
My Name is Den has been wheeled out for a mourning (no, not the wills hour) show. I say mourning instead of morning as I normally enter a period of intense grief whenever I set eyes on her. It’s cooking aids with Imon Siles. The usual interminable personal stuff is her tedious patter…My husband this..My husband that..My husband the other..My husband likes the right tool for job (Ooh err..Missus.)…My daughter did this…My daughter did that…She is apparently literally blown away by a £20 cutter - sounds painful.. Oh for the Camberwick Green/IW annoying characters musical box. We could then put her back in there with Mrs. Honeyman and Captain Snort to only bring her out again for use at the end of the last series - 1966.
 
It’s Carry On Cooking this morning, with more double entendres than a box of tatty old seaside postcards. Chef Big **** or is it Big Jack and My Name Is Short With Underlings..exploring dropping filthy double meanings in without us noticing. I have a big piece of pork to show you.. Can you come down my end..I am just going to get my Coq…au van out for you.. You get the drill. Do they think we don‘t know they are doing it? Chef Big **** then notices there are no plates on hand (always a great thing on a cooking show) “Come on guys“ he says. Then My Name Is Den pipes up…”Don’t just stand there looking at me,” she if looks could kill at some hapless floor manager. A very similar mood turn to when Puddleglum the Marsh-wiggle stamped out the witch’s fire in The Silver Chair.. ..

And we move on to some air fried potato wedges that look like they have been borrowed from the kitchens on The Titanic. Eeew .
 
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It always amazes me how IW behave with a new product to their shows, it's like it's the first time anyone has seen them or makes them, like today where every presenter is in a state of euphoria and wonderment at velvet hangers, they're all buying them. It's like they're totally unaware that these types of hangers have been available for years, even i've had them for years although mine have the hanger bar for ties etc on them, and you can get 50 packs on Amazon/Ebay for less than they are selling a 30 pack.
 
Pantomime time on IW, Sally making a right fuss/show of ordering multiple items on air with her phone while she supposed to be presenting. Of course it's all an act to encourage the brain dead to follow her lead and get ordering.

Any normal company selling goods wouldn't allow their staff to act in such an unprofessional manner, it's very inappropriate and rude for sales staff to be buying products when they are supposed to be serving/assissting customers, which viewers are during these show, it's not like there aren't enough off screen hours today for Sally, me, me, me, to place her orders without the whole pantomime act.
 
She better watch out - the ASA top man will be getting his teeth into her..
 

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Quality Brands and IW……they will peddle anything as a must have!

Solcal is also seen in sports direct and is a budget brand yet they are keen to tell us and link that it’s origins are in Southern California. Steve thinks his solcal gillet is ‘incredible’. Weirdo.

Linea air fryers, has anyone ever heard of them? Linea used to be a clothing brand in Debenhams. Those chips do look grim, chicken fat dripping onto them from the rotisierre. Very unhealthy IW. Does that guy think he is Jamie Oliver going on about ingredients being ‘best mates’

The air purifier, from another brand no one has heard of, how the hell have you survived all your life without one?!, down from £200 to £50, worrying in itself, sometimes you wake up ‘bunged up’ according to Sean, is he on about his bowel movements?! demo man sprays something and purity drops to 54 percent, minute later it’s back at 99. Question is, if he had just switched it off and switched it back on a minute later would it have been back at 99 anyway!
 
Been a long time since I've posted here simply because Ideal World nowadays is so often dull and repetitive: airfryers, Mike Ashley tat, more airfryers, bedding, collagen of duty (sorry, Protocol), more Mike Ashley tat, even more airfryers, but on top of that it's usually incredibly irritating to watch perhaps more so than it was a few years ago.

Anyway they can't be selling many watches since Tim Brittas is on this Wednesday evening with another watch show, and very disappointing that Tim has gone down the "I'm not lying" route like most of the other presenters. But it's the same old same old as 'sold' on Monday - Traser Super Sub, Vostok Energia (lo and behold it's appeared YET AGAIN as I'm typing this), Rocket N1 in the bronze case, Mathey-Tissot Retrograde, etc., etc., etc., etc.; all also shown by Simon Peters on Monday, and the Pete innuendo factor now cranked up to 11 making that unbearable to watch. (See I told you I don't watch much Ideal World nowadays.) Incidentally I'm not offended by the innuendo but it's so incredibly tacky and unfunny going on about a 'large tentacle' when referring to a sailor (it's on the back of one of the Vostok watches and has nothing to do with a sailor).

Anyway I didn't know Black and Decker also made airfryers...DON'T FORGET TO CHECK OUT YOUR BASKETS!!!!!!1!!!!1!!!!11!!!!!!!!!!
 
Howard? Oh, I had forgotten about him. Another one who thought he was being extraordinarily clever throwing in double meanings throughout his presentations. I remember he had ‘words’ with that tall guy with the moustache who used to do the cleaning cars products. The tall guy said something to him that was probably acceptable in 1972, but not when he said it. Not that long after, the aforementioned tall guy disappeared from the station. Also gone is Howard himself. Not a great miss, either. I thought he was both not as smart as he thought he was, and probably a lot more smarmy.
 
The Duke of Cheese said:
Howard? Oh, I had forgotten about him. Another one who thought he was being extraordinarily clever throwing in double meanings throughout his presentations. I remember he had ‘words’ with that tall guy with the moustache who used to do the cleaning cars products. The tall guy said something to him that was probably acceptable in 1972, but not when he said it. Not that long after, the aforementioned tall guy disappeared from the station. Also gone is Howard himself. Not a great miss, either. I thought he was both not as smart as he thought he was, and probably a lot more smarmy.
Click to expand...

Lloyd is the guys name.

He had a company to supply TV shopping channels with products and 'guest experts'.

Brands and Presenters | Selective Products Sales Ltd

Read all about our presenters and their careers here.
www.selectiveproductssales.co.uk
 
I think he said to him words to the effect that he should be the ‘fairy on top’ on a Christmas tree in the studio, which in these times is clearly not on. Howard seemed upset by it - replying along the lines of ‘you are not allowed to say things like that these days. Never saw him (Lloyd) again after that show. Though he may well have continued to be on the channel after that.
 
Well IW really going upmarket with their watch offerings on Friday night, the luxury brand of Daniel Wellington will be appearing, no doubt Mason will be wanting one but unfortunately will be sold out before he gets the chance to buy. ;)

Dirt cheap Chinese watches, a must for all watch collectors, your collection won't be complete without one, remember to get them insured. :ROFLMAO:
 

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