General ridiculousness thread

[merryone]

Sometimes (ahem!), you see something really ridiculous on one of these channels, but there's not enough there to start a whole thread, it wouldn't quite sit right in one of the other threads, but you've got to tell someone, even if it's the cat! So here were are I thought I'd start this thread for your little snippets of ridiculousness you've seen on any of the sit up channels. Of course if it's a biggie give it its own thread...but that little comment you're not quite sure what to do with, put it here!

Let me start the ball rolling....

The other night Sally Jacks was bigging up an exclusive new range of unisex perfume, and a "surprise". Peter sherlock was in the building. The perfumes? They were launching a series of perfumes based upon chocolate, the first one was "chocolate orange"...Love the smell of chocolate orange, I have to say but don't think I'd want to smell of it myself, let alone my fella! They told us to brace ourselves for the spearmint version....REALLY? The bottles looked smart, I'll give 'em that!

Anyway, Sally sprayed the perfume and said it smelled exactly like chocolate orange, and managed to work herself up into such a frenzy, that she started to cry? Method acting at its worst! And who was the renowned perfumier behind these exclusive must have fragrances? Yup, Lau-Bleedin' relle!

The surprise? A free pair of swaroski stud earrings with each bottle, you know the ones that were in the 1p basket at xmas! They must have sh*tloads to get rid of!

 

[Wirral70]

I like chocolate oranges, in fact I woofed a few over christmas (I particularly enjoyed the toffee one, delicious).

But why would anybody pay to smell like one? I wonder what's next, A mint Aero Cologne? Maybe a Liquorice body spray? Or a limited edition Jean Paul Dupont with a hint of Kit Kat?

No wonder they were giving away a free pair of christmas cracker earrings. Perhaps Sally's whinging was her conscience finally getting the better of herself?

I did mention this in another thread but LOLA was flogging duvets yesterday and at that price said it's not worth getting your own cleaned. But a few days earlier she was flogging a steam cleaner and said buy one as it's cheaper to use that than pay to get it cleaned!

 

[Mommabear]

Where is Peter Sherlock, have I missed him?

Who on earth would like to smell like a chocolate orange??

 

[Wirral70]

Where is Peter Sherlock, have I missed him?

Who on earth would like to smell like a chocolate orange??

He hasn't been on much this year Momma. I heard he is devoting much of his time to putting the kibosh on the potential JPD/Debenhams 'deal'. I have no idea whether that's true or not, much like Mike Mason didn't know if the rumoured 'deal' was true :wink:

 

[Bennyxp]

Nicola the other afternoon selling the poly max glue for sticking wood, metal etc. and she came out with "What if your son or daughter runs out of glue to stick their work in at school? Well, why not use this?"

 

[Hillary]

He hasn't been on much this year Momma. I heard he is devoting much of his time to putting the kibosh on the potential JPD/Debenhams 'deal'. I have no idea whether that's true or not, much like Mike Mason didn't know if the rumoured 'deal' was true :wink:

Is his perfume selling?

 

[Enigma]

Nicola the other afternoon selling the poly max glue for sticking wood, metal etc. and she came out with "What if your son or daughter runs out of glue to stick their work in at school? Well, why not use this?"

It's probably what Bid use to make their AAAAAAAA Tanzanite goild foil jewellery.

 

[Wirral70]

Is his perfume selling?

I have only seen it on sale once Hillary, did you see the packaging? It looked like something knocked up at home on a Epson printer!

The bottle was quite nice though, probably accounted for 98% of it's utterly ludicrous overall cost, it sold though.

I seem to recall Peter and Sally Jacks whinged during the sale, the emotion of it all. Peter seemed moved, he's clearly a modest, humble kinda guy.

 

[Hillary]

Thanks Wirral. I didn't buy any so don't know what its like. If you buy some from the channels having not used it before; you put it on and it smells like nothing on earth, you can't send it back can you? There are some perfumes which smell lie cats on me after a few hours. They don't suit my skin. I suppose if its a perfume you know, your safe though.

 

[merryone]

Thanks Wirral. I didn't buy any so don't know what its like. If you buy some from the channels having not used it before; you put it on and it smells like nothing on earth, you can't send it back can you? There are some perfumes which smell lie cats on me after a few hours. They don't suit my skin. I suppose if its a perfume you know, your safe though.

That's right.....Same thing happened to me. I ordered a twin pack of perfume One was Liz Taylor's Diamonds and Emeralds, which is one of my favourite perfumes, and it came with a bottle of her Diamonds and Rubies, I didn't really need another bottle of emeralds 'cause I've already got one and they very large, but I hadn't tried Rubies. Diamonds and Sapphires is a lovely daytime scent, as is Violet Eyes. Well folks, let me tell you, Diamonds and rubies is probably one of the most disgusting perfumes I've ever smelt. Dunno about smelling like cats after a few hours....a few minutes. It's smells like a cross between leather car seats (but not in a good way) a dirty ashtray, and Zoflora disinfectant.....YUUUUUUCK! Pity I couldn't have sent it back and got half a refund lol!

 

[Wirral70]

Thanks Wirral. I didn't buy any so don't know what its like. If you buy some from the channels having not used it before; you put it on and it smells like nothing on earth, you can't send it back can you? There are some perfumes which smell lie cats on me after a few hours. They don't suit my skin. I suppose if its a perfume you know, your safe though.

The crazy thing with 'Peter's' fragrance is they then went on to sell make your own kits from the same company for a fraction of the cost. Didn't exactly inspire confidence in 'Peter's' stink!

 

[merryone]

Caroline's just selling a tote bag. It's got quite a few unique selling points, it's woollen, it's large, it's fashionable, it's got " proper handles". So you can put loads of stuff in it, it's not going to break under the strain, it's unusual, it's trendy...so did she really need to tell us that she bought a banana and a bottle of water in the mini mart the other day. I thought she was going to go into her usual....and they cost even more than this bag, even with the postage and packaging! No, she said "I was in my local mini mart the other day, and I bought a banana and a small bottle of water, if I had this bag, I could have put them in it!" No sh*t Sherlock!!!! She went on to say, it means you don't have to ask for a carrier bag.....Blimey it'll pay for itself in 50 years then!

STOP PRESS.....A bag you can put stuff in! Amazing, or what?!

 

[Wirral70]

Caroline's just selling a tote bag. It's got quite a few unique selling points, it's woollen, it's large, it's fashionable, it's got " proper handles". So you can put loads of stuff in it, it's not going to break under the strain, it's unusual, it's trendy...so did she really need to tell us that she bought a banana and a bottle of water in the mini mart the other day. I thought she was going to go into her usual....and they cost even more than this bag, even with the postage and packaging! No, she said "I was in my local mini mart the other day, and I bought a banana and a small bottle of water, if I had this bag, I could have put them in it!" No sh*t Sherlock!!!! She went on to say, it means you don't have to ask for a carrier bag.....Blimey it'll pay for itself in 50 years then!

STOP PRESS.....A bag you can put stuff in! Amazing, or what?!

Thank god Caroline is better, I was really worried.

 

[merryone]

Thank god Caroline is better, I was really worried.

Eh? Has she been ill?

 

[Wirral70]

Eh? Has she been ill?

Aye, off for a few days.

But she's back now, make no mistake!

 

[Krlsthjckl]

Peter Simon has just claimed he uses Blue Magic cleaning solution on his TV Screen....:thinking:

Assuming he has a plasma or LCD i cant imagine that was a good idea whatsoever....

 

[Enigma]

Peter Simon has just claimed he uses Blue Magic cleaning solution on his TV Screen....:thinking:

Assuming he has a plasma or LCD i cant imagine that was a good idea whatsoever....

I think he drinks it.

With a meths chaser.

 

[tristar]

Charlie is cute, in a geeky way! wonder if Peter has noticed that? he ha

 

[Pola]

James Russell just sold a set of "3 handy bulbs".

He held one in front of the zip of his trousers to demonstate how it moves up and down (to change the direction of the light).

Cue much giggling behind the cameras.

 

[deedee]

James Russell just sold a set of "3 handy bulbs".

He held one in front of the zip of his trousers to demonstate how it moves up and down (to change the direction of the light).

Cue much giggling behind the cameras.

yes I saw that!
hold on to your hat Pola, James is going to show us his dongle soon!