Frazzled
Sense of humour intact
Now, I'm getting the distinct impression you're not all entering into the spirit of "Christmas in July", bit unfair after all the effort QVC have gone to this week. So come on, I've got a glass of mulled wine, shoved some mince pies in the oven (found them in the cupboard). Put your paper hats on and sing along with me, all together now!
:song:
On the first day of Christmas,
Santa Franklin sent to me
a crappy artificial xmas tree.
On the second day of Christmas,
A right Charlie sent to me
Two festive bears
and a crappy artificial xmas tree.
On the third day of Christmas,
A nodding Gnome did send to me
Three poncy ettas
Two festive bears
and a crappy artificial xmas tree.
:song:
On the fourth day of Christmas,
Tinsel Chuntley sent to me
Four chocolate logs
Three poncy ettas
Two festive bears
and a crappy artificial xmas tree.
On the fifth day of Christmas,
Jill Frankincense sent to me
Five amaaaaazing rings,
Four chocolate logs
Three poncy ettas
Two festive bears
and a crappy artificial xmas tree.
On the sixth day of Christmas,
Fairy Clairy sent to me
Six Mankee candles,
Five amaaaaazing rings,
Four chocolate logs
Three poncy ettas
Two festive bears
and a crappy artificial xmas tree.
:song:
On the seventh day of Christmas,
Micklemass Murphy sent to me
Seven turkey roulades
Six Mankee candles,
Five amaaaaazing rings,
Four chocolate logs
Three poncy ettas
Two festive bears
and a crappy artificial xmas tree.
On the eighth day of Christmas,
Party Pipper sent to me
Eight feathered peacocks
Seven turkey roulades
Six Mankee candles,
Five amaaaaazing rings,
Four chocolate logs
Three poncy ettas
Two festive bears
and a crappy artificial xmas tree.
On the ninth day of Christmas,
The Queen did send to me
Nine presenters prancing,
Eight feathered peacocks
Seven turkey roulades
Six Mankee candles,
Five amaaaaazing rings,
Four chocolate logs
Three poncy ettas
Two festive bears
and a crappy artificial xmas tree.
:song:
On the tenth day of Christmas,
CindaYella sent to me
Ten pots of actual cream,
Nine presenters prancing,
Eight feathered peacocks
Seven turkey roulades
Six Mankee candles,
Five amaaaaazing rings,
Four chocolate logs
Three poncy ettas
Two festive bears
and a crappy artificial xmas tree.
On the eleventh day of Christmas,
QVC did send to me
Eleven presenters griping,
Ten pots of actual cream,
Nine presenters prancing,
Eight feathered peacocks
Seven turkey roulades
Six Mankee candles,
Five amaaaaazing rings,
Four chocolate logs
Three poncy ettas
Two festive bears
and a crappy artificial xmas tree.
:song:
On the twelfth day of Christmas,
The postman said to me
"I can't take anymore,
bringing this lot to your door.
My back won't take the strain,
and I'm fed up with the pain".
I said "It doesn't matter,
I'm not listening to their patter".
"No more room inside the shed,
up the path I have been led".
Do my shopping in July,
saving money if I buy"
But I realise now it's here,
It's the sodding stuff they had last year!
"Merry July Christmas Everyone"….. "and you!" I hear you cry!!!!
:song:
On the first day of Christmas,
Santa Franklin sent to me
a crappy artificial xmas tree.
On the second day of Christmas,
A right Charlie sent to me
Two festive bears
and a crappy artificial xmas tree.
On the third day of Christmas,
A nodding Gnome did send to me
Three poncy ettas
Two festive bears
and a crappy artificial xmas tree.
:song:
On the fourth day of Christmas,
Tinsel Chuntley sent to me
Four chocolate logs
Three poncy ettas
Two festive bears
and a crappy artificial xmas tree.
On the fifth day of Christmas,
Jill Frankincense sent to me
Five amaaaaazing rings,
Four chocolate logs
Three poncy ettas
Two festive bears
and a crappy artificial xmas tree.
On the sixth day of Christmas,
Fairy Clairy sent to me
Six Mankee candles,
Five amaaaaazing rings,
Four chocolate logs
Three poncy ettas
Two festive bears
and a crappy artificial xmas tree.
:song:
On the seventh day of Christmas,
Micklemass Murphy sent to me
Seven turkey roulades
Six Mankee candles,
Five amaaaaazing rings,
Four chocolate logs
Three poncy ettas
Two festive bears
and a crappy artificial xmas tree.
On the eighth day of Christmas,
Party Pipper sent to me
Eight feathered peacocks
Seven turkey roulades
Six Mankee candles,
Five amaaaaazing rings,
Four chocolate logs
Three poncy ettas
Two festive bears
and a crappy artificial xmas tree.
On the ninth day of Christmas,
The Queen did send to me
Nine presenters prancing,
Eight feathered peacocks
Seven turkey roulades
Six Mankee candles,
Five amaaaaazing rings,
Four chocolate logs
Three poncy ettas
Two festive bears
and a crappy artificial xmas tree.
:song:
On the tenth day of Christmas,
CindaYella sent to me
Ten pots of actual cream,
Nine presenters prancing,
Eight feathered peacocks
Seven turkey roulades
Six Mankee candles,
Five amaaaaazing rings,
Four chocolate logs
Three poncy ettas
Two festive bears
and a crappy artificial xmas tree.
On the eleventh day of Christmas,
QVC did send to me
Eleven presenters griping,
Ten pots of actual cream,
Nine presenters prancing,
Eight feathered peacocks
Seven turkey roulades
Six Mankee candles,
Five amaaaaazing rings,
Four chocolate logs
Three poncy ettas
Two festive bears
and a crappy artificial xmas tree.
:song:
On the twelfth day of Christmas,
The postman said to me
"I can't take anymore,
bringing this lot to your door.
My back won't take the strain,
and I'm fed up with the pain".
I said "It doesn't matter,
I'm not listening to their patter".
"No more room inside the shed,
up the path I have been led".
Do my shopping in July,
saving money if I buy"
But I realise now it's here,
It's the sodding stuff they had last year!
"Merry July Christmas Everyone"….. "and you!" I hear you cry!!!!