Random musings and general banter.

He missed a casting with The Shining.. Breaking down doors with a maniacal stare and laugh, and an axe on three flexis…

Duke of Cheese said:

He missed a casting with The Shining.. Breaking down doors with a maniacal stare and laugh, and an axe on three flexis…

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Poor Muriel only likes to buy from Pedro.....

Jannice says think of him as a mannequin.

Sorry Jannice can't picture it, mannequins "never lie to you" and have personality when clothed, you on the other hand ...................

galesgal57 said:

Torchy with the piddly boxer shorts. Said someone he went to uni with got the equivalent of trench foot around his privates wearing damp underpants. Trench todger anyone?

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Those are not words you expect to hear from a selly telly presenter. Salesmen in John Lewis never come out with anecdotes like that

Only flicked over to Dirty Peter's evening shift a couple of times - it was a constant stream of "as I say.....and again.....not only.....again....alright...as I say....again...not only".

Even by his standards, it was a shocking delivery of random phrases that meant nothing.

Trying to flog the "vacuum of the year" he was toiling to put it together and went to a break saying "it's probably the best vacuum you'll.........probably buy".

Poor Pedro should be tucked up in his hovel under a weighted blanket at this time of year.

Now he thinks methanol is a key ingredient of his pure glo oils. What a bogus ruin he is.

I've been watching Fanny Cradock cooks for Christmas on BBC4. I'd forgotten how ham fisted and rubbish she was. She used a pair of garden secateurs to cut open her poultry, and they were dirty and rusty, even though she insisted they had been sterilised.

I always thought she was a man in drag. Where that left Johnny, I don’t know.

God that bloke is a such a bag of pass the sick bucketness. That knob end of a sweater doesn’t help his credibility cause.

Oh don’t come out with that marketing budget shyte again, Morgan. You utter….

More downright lies from Torchy about Duchump.

"They could spend their marketing budget on television adverts or paying influencers, instead they give us a great deal on watches and we spend a lot of time raising their brand awareness".

Complete nonsense.
The watches are cheaper on their website with the plethora of discount codes around.

They're just a classic fake RRP set-up.

Not even Pedro or Of-the-Masons has tried this whopper.

Duke of Cheese said:

No way was that Reign watch ever sold at £259.99 on the channel.

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Now now, always remember the IW mantra ...

HughTwo said:

More downright lies from Torchy about Duchump.

"They could spend their marketing budget on television adverts or paying influencers, instead they give us a great deal on watches and we spend a lot of time raising their brand awareness".

Complete nonsense.
The watches are cheaper on their website with the plethora of discount codes around.

They're just a classic fake RRP set-up.

Not even Pedro or Of-the-Masons has tried this whopper.

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Sorry to disagree with you but I for one believe them.

Why oh why would a brand want their watches draped over the sexy wrist of an A lister on billboards, in top magazines, on the social media channels of top influencers and on the side of buses etc etc when they can be draped over the wrist of a selly telly presenter on a channel watched by the dozens, especially if the presenter points at the product with dirty and/or chipped nails ... surely that's exactly what brands dream of in terms of brand awareness, no?

Can you pass me a cloth please, this one has my slavers all over it ...

I think he is the worst shipping television presenter I have seen in nearly 30 years. Steve Whatley would turn in his grave if he could see his act. I fail to see a redeeming quality in him in terms of how he goes about doing the job.

You WILL buy a Duchump!

Hammy60 said:

Jannice says think of him as a mannequin.

Sorry Jannice can't picture it, mannequins "never lie to you" and have personality when clothed, you on the other hand ...................

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More like a dummy.

Torchy Morgan could take the role of Kaa, the snake with hypnotic eyes, from the original Disney’s Jungle Book.

Battiola73 said:

More like a dummy.

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A dummy has someone in control of what it says.

Torchy with the tiny sewing machine again.

He reads out a text from Pedro asking if he can repair the seam on his shorts!

Ok, who was it?

HughTwo said:

Torchy with the tiny sewing machine again.

He reads out a text from Pedro asking if he can repair the seam on his shorts!

Ok, who was it?

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That miniature sewing machine is absolutely fabulous.

The little info box said it was Multi-Fuctional!

Wahhey. I'm surprised it's not being sold by Lovehoney.

What I dislike about him and all the others hawking these watches on Ideal World is the strongly implied ‘you are purchasing an investment’ tripe they peddle. Reinforced by the garbage coming out of his gob two nights running about the low price there, compared to the RRP being possible because of the hundreds of thousands of pounds the watch company saves on mainstream (i.e. people are actually watching) advertising. This is essentially conning those who accept what they are being told without question. Older people, say. People not very internet capable - maybe looking to buy a special gift for a grandson, and thinking they are giving him something that will appreciate for him in value at the same time. The truth is these are grossly inflated RRPs compared to manufacturing costs, set in place to give merchants the opportunity to offer the watches at fractions of that RRP. Creating, in turn, that false sense of great value to buy. What Morgan failed to mention is the voucher codes you can input on the Chumpywumpy website, and then get the same watch reduced to similar levels to what Ideal World is selling them for. What’s the YouTube average viewer count for the live feed? 10 people? Add in a pro-rata number for the various other media platforms and being generous…maybe a few thousand watching at any one time. Who in their right minds is going to say they are saving on a massive advertising campaign to get that as their reward? Equally, it isn’t exactly great for your brand exclusivity and kudos to endorse your near £2000 watches being offered for sale for a fifth of the price, is it? Like them saying Rolex is happy for them to advertise their watches to a couple of hundred people for 25% of the RRP.

Are watches in general even a good investment to make? Out of curiosity, rather than any need, I went to one of the main Internet watch buying companies (Subdial) and asked for a price to buy on my £3000 plus, two years old Tudor Black Bay watch. I got back an offer of £1600. What a fantastic return, not. That doesn’t sound like you’d do much better offering your Duchumpiato ‘investment piece’ either.