Random musings and general banter.

I haven't watched for a couple of days. Mike's back, and what quality item does he have to offer us? 50 Magic sponges! I thought the clearance event was to get rid of the dross, but it's just the same old crap.

galesgal57 said:

I haven't watched for a couple of days. Mike's back, and what quality item does he have to offer us? 50 Magic sponges! I thought the clearance event was to get rid of the dross, but it's just the same old crap.

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Its so market stall, isn't it? Or the middle of a shopping centre, c.1996

He's been selling Exact spanners for years and years, he says. The thing is..when 20 plus years have elapsed since he started. It’s not exactly checkable, is it? Same for all the others...they can essentially say whatever they like with no past records kept. I certainly don't recall him selling £9.99 spanners before this version. Working with a gallery full but not one that can shift knobs.

historymystery said:

Oh blimey, got to have one of these, you could be on to something! How much should I get it insured for, do you think?

Needs bringing out in time for Christmas - the Postman would love it as a gift.

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If our postal workers go on strike at Christmas we know who to blame

Herring said:

DEREK? DERRRREEEEEK!?!
Yes love?
I'VE DECIDED TO INVEST IN GOLD.
Oh, love! This mean no more selly telly cr…You still got 20 of them kayaks clogging up conservatory.
GOLD BARS, DEREK. 24 CAROT. JUST BOUGHT 100.
Blimey love! Gold?! They'll hold value more than all your DuChump watches. Can't barter those if world goes to sh…
THEY'RE NOT JUST GOLD BARS EITHER, DEREK...
No? Platinum, silver, some kind of alloy mix?
SOAP, DEREK.
Oh fu…



Should be £140, but ours for £19.99 — I’ve sent Rachel Reeves a message. Think I know how she can plug that black hole…

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I prefer to wear gold around my neck not wash my hands with it

Get very excited folks! The walking canes are tonight's Pick of the Day.

A text from a gentleman in his 70th decade, Mozza tells us. 704 year old Methuselah from Hull. Sorry Mike, I got distracted. Your next piece of tat I would eat my own eyeballs to not buy??? Oh lovely - a Bluetooth Urn…

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Watching the mighty Villa so please gang if you can send my apologies to Mike of the Morons.
I will of course watch later on You tube and buy everything.

I could of course email my apologies..possibly,probably,maybe..

With apologies to the great Sir Michael Caine:

My name is Cane, Walking Cane
and I'm back on your screen yet again
I'm sturdy and I'm four in one
I light up, flash, keep you steady
And I can even raise the alarm
So why not buy me in silver, red or blue?
Or multibuy all three
A bargain just for you.
And you. And you. And you.

Not many people know that.

Scraping the barrel said:

Watching the mighty Villa so please gang if you can send my apologies to Mike of the Morons.
I will of course watch later on You tube and buy everything.

I could of course email my apologies..possibly,probably,maybe..

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Old enough to remember them win the thing. 1982? Spink in goal?

Is that serious? They really are doing that cane again? Feigning a limp around the studio? Mocking by accident or design disabled people with genuine impairments? What a bunch of wasters they are…

That awful cheesy looking air freshener with the look from a whore’s boudoir now…

Scraping the barrel said:

Watching the mighty Villa so please gang if you can send my apologies to Mike of the Morons.
I will of course watch later on You tube and buy everything.

I could of course email my apologies..possibly,probably,maybe..

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I would happily email on your behalf but Market Stall Mike never tells us the email address. The only one I could find was [email protected].

As this forum is read by the presenters and crew perhaps they could tell us an email address for each presenter. Starting with Mike of the Masons. So we can all tell him how much we like him.

Duke of Cheese said:

Is that serious? They really are doing that cane again? Feigning a limp around the studio? Mocking by accident or design disabled people with genuine impairments? What a bunch of wasters they are…

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More of the Dubai air fresheners. Either the great British public aren't interested or IW3 have imported 2 million cans. You decide.

He's managed to negotiate a special price for us (he's good like that), then said that we could smell "what people in palatial lives smell" (making as much sense as Dirty Pete). Yeah, I bet all the British aristocracy get all their air fresheners from Dubai...

Hammy60 said:

Think he's the best pretendy "Chef" they can afford or more likely most actuall Chefs would have nothing to do with them.

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I didn't see what he was saying about Michelin Star chefs, but working under one, does not make you one by association. He could well be Sid from Sid's cafe in Only Fools and Horses.

Now saying his son smells. Said he's a clean lad but needs to get some deodorant on him. If h's clean then he won't smell. I hope junior knows what his delightful father is saying about him to dozens of viewers.

The thing I respect most about them is their broadcasting consistency - night after night after night they never fail to make you despair in the darker, cynical side of human nature. WE ONLY WANT…YOU… won’t get any of my money…

“NON-WORKING SAMPLE.”…Like suppliers always intentionally send a defective watch to show on television….Fu….Hell…Unbelievable BS of the lowest order…The lack of respect for the intelligence of their audience is incredible…

Not many left,flying out the door.When they've gone they've gone.Same time next week then Mike

Duke of Cheese said:

Lovely to hear about hear copious bowel movements today. She is usually full of it, but clearly running short of it - literally. The yacht inspired trousers look good, though….

View attachment 29776

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"I want to hear about Salleh's chronic diarrhea". Said no-one ever.

Buy the compression socks, and if they're not suitable, just return them. You mustn't open the box, or heaven forbid try them on. How are you supposed to know if they are suitable?

Muttley said:

"I want to hear about Salleh's chronic diarrhea". Said no-one ever.

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Hope she had a fit of non stop sneezing as well lol